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So unbelievably $%#*&^@!{+#$!!!!!
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<blockquote data-quote="gcvmom" data-source="post: 445241" data-attributes="member: 3444"><p>HaoZi -- I'm trying to get in the habit of showing husband the numbers twice a month now when I pay bills. I used to do it every three months or so, but as we can all see, that didn't have much impact.</p><p></p><p>Star, husband called them back to find out what specs their car/truck has that they'll be selling and then found out they are planning to sell some other stuff -- like their tool shed and mower and... lots of stuff they can part with that they don't need, won't need and would serve them better as cash. So he's backed waaaay off now. Seems that he was reacting to their "statement" as if it were a request. That's HIS illness of codependency. Plain and simple.</p><p></p><p>The other thing I pointed out is: What's the rush? They aren't on a deadline to move out here. sister in law#3 has to pay the rent on both places regardless. She's going to try to rent out the TX place, but that will take time. And the parents weren't going to head out here until some time in August. They've got doctor appointments and loose ends to tie up this month. Plenty of time to raise cash for their move. THEIR MOVE. NOT OUR MOVE. GAH!</p><p></p><p>I hope my kids never, EVER feel beholden to us like husband does to his parents. </p><p></p><p>I took difficult child 2 and went to the beach today. It was very good to have those ocean breezes blowing through my head to clear all the <a href="mailto:cr@p">cr@p</a> away. <img src="/community/styles/default/xenforo/smilies/emoticons/bigsmile.gif" class="smilie" loading="lazy" alt=":bigsmile:" title="big smile :bigsmile:" data-shortname=":bigsmile:" /></p><p></p><p>I admittedly have a lot of anxiety over our finances these days because husband is not making anywhere near the money he used to make, the kids are getting more expensive, and we aren't getting any younger. We are less secure day to day now than we were three years ago, there's no doubt about it. So when he makes noise about doing something stupid (like throwing more money at these walking money pits) my nerves get wound just a few hundred turns tighter. Sigh. Hopefully he's seeing that. </p><p></p><p>And Seriously, this is for you: I emailed husband's credit card issuer and go them to cut the limit by more than 50%!!! WOOT! The limit was in the stratosphere anyway. Now it's in the reasonable range. And guess what? He's none the wiser since he has NO IDEA about any of his financial account details. Serves him right, bonehead. Oops! Did I say that OUT LOUD?! <img src="/community/styles/default/xenforo/smilies/emoticons/winks.gif" class="smilie" loading="lazy" alt=":winks:" title="winks :winks:" data-shortname=":winks:" /></p></blockquote><p></p>
[QUOTE="gcvmom, post: 445241, member: 3444"] HaoZi -- I'm trying to get in the habit of showing husband the numbers twice a month now when I pay bills. I used to do it every three months or so, but as we can all see, that didn't have much impact. Star, husband called them back to find out what specs their car/truck has that they'll be selling and then found out they are planning to sell some other stuff -- like their tool shed and mower and... lots of stuff they can part with that they don't need, won't need and would serve them better as cash. So he's backed waaaay off now. Seems that he was reacting to their "statement" as if it were a request. That's HIS illness of codependency. Plain and simple. The other thing I pointed out is: What's the rush? They aren't on a deadline to move out here. sister in law#3 has to pay the rent on both places regardless. She's going to try to rent out the TX place, but that will take time. And the parents weren't going to head out here until some time in August. They've got doctor appointments and loose ends to tie up this month. Plenty of time to raise cash for their move. THEIR MOVE. NOT OUR MOVE. GAH! I hope my kids never, EVER feel beholden to us like husband does to his parents. I took difficult child 2 and went to the beach today. It was very good to have those ocean breezes blowing through my head to clear all the [EMAIL="cr@p"]cr@p[/EMAIL] away. :bigsmile: I admittedly have a lot of anxiety over our finances these days because husband is not making anywhere near the money he used to make, the kids are getting more expensive, and we aren't getting any younger. We are less secure day to day now than we were three years ago, there's no doubt about it. So when he makes noise about doing something stupid (like throwing more money at these walking money pits) my nerves get wound just a few hundred turns tighter. Sigh. Hopefully he's seeing that. And Seriously, this is for you: I emailed husband's credit card issuer and go them to cut the limit by more than 50%!!! WOOT! The limit was in the stratosphere anyway. Now it's in the reasonable range. And guess what? He's none the wiser since he has NO IDEA about any of his financial account details. Serves him right, bonehead. Oops! Did I say that OUT LOUD?! :winks: [/QUOTE]
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