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Someone tell me what to do...world fell apart tonight
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<blockquote data-quote="DammitJanet" data-source="post: 499625" data-attributes="member: 1514"><p>I dont know if I have anywhere else to go. I will not saddle my grown kids to taking me on. Wont do it. Number one, I would be miserable living with them myself. I am not a very social person for more than about an hour or two. Lets remember I have issues. I am mentally ill! Social anxiety is one of my problems. My home is supposed to be my place I can be safe and now it wont be. That is what Tony cant get through his thick skull. If I dont have a place to be safe I will truly go out of my mind. The only reason I have been able to keep it together as well as I have is because I have had a relatively safe place to come home to. I dont feel like I have to be "on" when I am on normally. If we have people here, I do. I dont know how long I can be on without cracking. </p><p></p><p>Just typing that out made me realize what the issue is. No one understands why its such a big problem for me to have someone stay over for a few days. Tony is like "well we will just go get you a couple of more nightgowns". Its more than that. Yeah I can make sure I am always covered up but its more that I have to always feel like a hostess instead of coming home to my sanctuary where I can do what I want without worrying about anyone else. I dont want to worry about if someone else thinks its odd that I dont come out of my room all day long except to hit the kitchen. Thats my business. I certainly dont want to go out and sit in the living room and make small talk. I dont do that now. If I am in the kitchen now its to clean and make dinner and then I sit in the living room to watch tv while I do it. This will interfere with that. Or I can just make it so it doesnt and do what I do with Tony and Billy...change the channel to what I want to watch. Thats what I should do. I always feel I have to be nicer to people who dont live with me all the time. That has to change in this instance. </p><p></p><p>About living somewhere else. I dont think I could get in any sort of handicapped apartment that is income based because the mobile home is in my name. Also if I just transfer it, there is a waiting period before I can be considered unless something happens like fire or hurricane or some such thing like that. I suppose if I actually got kicked off by their family should something happen to Tony and had to sell it for next to nothing that would work too. And who knows how long the waiting list is for housing in my area. </p><p></p><p>I suggested looking into salvation army or shelters in Greenville SC or something like that but that was shut down. That is such a larger area than we are. There have to be more resources.</p></blockquote><p></p>
[QUOTE="DammitJanet, post: 499625, member: 1514"] I dont know if I have anywhere else to go. I will not saddle my grown kids to taking me on. Wont do it. Number one, I would be miserable living with them myself. I am not a very social person for more than about an hour or two. Lets remember I have issues. I am mentally ill! Social anxiety is one of my problems. My home is supposed to be my place I can be safe and now it wont be. That is what Tony cant get through his thick skull. If I dont have a place to be safe I will truly go out of my mind. The only reason I have been able to keep it together as well as I have is because I have had a relatively safe place to come home to. I dont feel like I have to be "on" when I am on normally. If we have people here, I do. I dont know how long I can be on without cracking. Just typing that out made me realize what the issue is. No one understands why its such a big problem for me to have someone stay over for a few days. Tony is like "well we will just go get you a couple of more nightgowns". Its more than that. Yeah I can make sure I am always covered up but its more that I have to always feel like a hostess instead of coming home to my sanctuary where I can do what I want without worrying about anyone else. I dont want to worry about if someone else thinks its odd that I dont come out of my room all day long except to hit the kitchen. Thats my business. I certainly dont want to go out and sit in the living room and make small talk. I dont do that now. If I am in the kitchen now its to clean and make dinner and then I sit in the living room to watch tv while I do it. This will interfere with that. Or I can just make it so it doesnt and do what I do with Tony and Billy...change the channel to what I want to watch. Thats what I should do. I always feel I have to be nicer to people who dont live with me all the time. That has to change in this instance. About living somewhere else. I dont think I could get in any sort of handicapped apartment that is income based because the mobile home is in my name. Also if I just transfer it, there is a waiting period before I can be considered unless something happens like fire or hurricane or some such thing like that. I suppose if I actually got kicked off by their family should something happen to Tony and had to sell it for next to nothing that would work too. And who knows how long the waiting list is for housing in my area. I suggested looking into salvation army or shelters in Greenville SC or something like that but that was shut down. That is such a larger area than we are. There have to be more resources. [/QUOTE]
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