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Son avoiding home after being released from juvenile hall
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<blockquote data-quote="Star*" data-source="post: 104170" data-attributes="member: 4964"><p>Oh Witz - if that were only the case. </p><p></p><p>I think - (am not sure at all about this) but the descriptions on his moods I'm getting makes me think that he is an emerging BiPolar (BP). </p><p></p><p>I did get a call today - He was up early, made breakfast, cleaned up after himself and had talked to the "house elf" I call him Dobby. </p><p></p><p>Here's where it gets (frustrating)for a Mom. When he went to this place we were told there would be a counselor, meetings, mental health, school, Integrated Listening Systems (ILS) trainee he would learn to cook, fill out resumes, ride a bus, manage a bank account. (blah blah blah) </p><p></p><p>Today he is trying to find a job by CALLING places that I couldn't even get a job at and I have some spanky credentials. So in an effort to try to work at my job, answer the phone AND counsel my son I kindly asked him to shoot for something more appropriate. Not lower - just better suited. And then I told him NOT to call anyone - to go there. He said getting a ride is a problem. I said that is horse clop. </p><p></p><p>I called our local Salvation Army. I volunteer there and I explained that I needed them to help him figuring tis not their problem - but they actually said they would try to help him. (faint)</p><p></p><p>UPS and Fed x are hiring package handlers which I think he could do well and at almost twice min. wage - but he has to be 18. Then I sat and thought WHY are you HELPING HIM? ARGH. This is not my battle - but I feel so bad. Really I do. Not guilty - I just feel the overwhelming sense of his unmedicated, moody frustration. </p><p></p><p>He has been getting up, trying to do what is right, trying to find a job, trying trying trying and he wanted to know "WHY is it Mom that when I try I get knocked down even harder?" I had no answer other than to tell him --just because you are working towards being better - doesn't mean the world should part with it's misery to help you. I still think there is a chance with his rapid mood swings, aggression and sullen demeanor - he could be BiPolar (BP). I have encouraged him to get MH counseling and appointment and asked Dobby to help him - Dobby said "Uh you have ta call the caseworker." :grrr: AND YOU would be getting paid to do WHAT? </p><p></p><p>Is it just me? Is it just me feeling a twinge of sorry for him? I really do love my son, and I'm trying so very very hard to stay out of this - but when they call YOU and elude to the fact that the people who are supposed to and being paid to help them arent' - and the only other option is to NOT come home - what do you do? </p><p></p><p>He asked about Christmas - I said "I dunno" and he said "Just another day Mom - don't worry about me." Then he called DF and asked him for a phone number and said "Mom told me she was pretty much canceling Christmas." Three minutes later DF (The original Scrooge) and said "What is going on? No Christmas?" and I said "Nope - you finally got your wish - a season without a tree, without the first bit of decorations, and I'm not making dinner either!" </p><p></p><p>I fear a talk coming on when I return home tonight. Except for the cards? You'd think we didn't celebrate at all - It may be like you said SLSH - I'm so over being disappointed by EVERY holiday - I'm lowering my expectations and using a sharpie to mark every holiday off my 2008 calendar. Maybe the year will be easier if I expect very little from it. </p><p></p><p>Who would have EVER thought it would get to this?</p></blockquote><p></p>
[QUOTE="Star*, post: 104170, member: 4964"] Oh Witz - if that were only the case. I think - (am not sure at all about this) but the descriptions on his moods I'm getting makes me think that he is an emerging BiPolar (BP). I did get a call today - He was up early, made breakfast, cleaned up after himself and had talked to the "house elf" I call him Dobby. Here's where it gets (frustrating)for a Mom. When he went to this place we were told there would be a counselor, meetings, mental health, school, Integrated Listening Systems (ILS) trainee he would learn to cook, fill out resumes, ride a bus, manage a bank account. (blah blah blah) Today he is trying to find a job by CALLING places that I couldn't even get a job at and I have some spanky credentials. So in an effort to try to work at my job, answer the phone AND counsel my son I kindly asked him to shoot for something more appropriate. Not lower - just better suited. And then I told him NOT to call anyone - to go there. He said getting a ride is a problem. I said that is horse clop. I called our local Salvation Army. I volunteer there and I explained that I needed them to help him figuring tis not their problem - but they actually said they would try to help him. (faint) UPS and Fed x are hiring package handlers which I think he could do well and at almost twice min. wage - but he has to be 18. Then I sat and thought WHY are you HELPING HIM? ARGH. This is not my battle - but I feel so bad. Really I do. Not guilty - I just feel the overwhelming sense of his unmedicated, moody frustration. He has been getting up, trying to do what is right, trying to find a job, trying trying trying and he wanted to know "WHY is it Mom that when I try I get knocked down even harder?" I had no answer other than to tell him --just because you are working towards being better - doesn't mean the world should part with it's misery to help you. I still think there is a chance with his rapid mood swings, aggression and sullen demeanor - he could be BiPolar (BP). I have encouraged him to get MH counseling and appointment and asked Dobby to help him - Dobby said "Uh you have ta call the caseworker." [img]:grrr:[/img] AND YOU would be getting paid to do WHAT? Is it just me? Is it just me feeling a twinge of sorry for him? I really do love my son, and I'm trying so very very hard to stay out of this - but when they call YOU and elude to the fact that the people who are supposed to and being paid to help them arent' - and the only other option is to NOT come home - what do you do? He asked about Christmas - I said "I dunno" and he said "Just another day Mom - don't worry about me." Then he called DF and asked him for a phone number and said "Mom told me she was pretty much canceling Christmas." Three minutes later DF (The original Scrooge) and said "What is going on? No Christmas?" and I said "Nope - you finally got your wish - a season without a tree, without the first bit of decorations, and I'm not making dinner either!" I fear a talk coming on when I return home tonight. Except for the cards? You'd think we didn't celebrate at all - It may be like you said SLSH - I'm so over being disappointed by EVERY holiday - I'm lowering my expectations and using a sharpie to mark every holiday off my 2008 calendar. Maybe the year will be easier if I expect very little from it. Who would have EVER thought it would get to this? [/QUOTE]
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