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Parent Support Forums
Substance Abuse
Son is out.
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<blockquote data-quote="Copabanana" data-source="post: 716773" data-attributes="member: 18958"><p>The thing is: Even if we get strong and make better choices it supports the possibility of their changing. Only that. This forum is full of adult children who chose to live lives on the edge including my own son. Many of those parents are models of detachment. It mattered not at all in the choices of their kids, mainly sons.</p><p></p><p>Why am I writing this mean thing? Because I (we) have to get it through my head that my son's stability and safety and productivity have nothing to do with what I choose. I just need to get out of his way. And make my life about me.</p><p></p><p>The deep sorrow and longing I feel are not about him. (I do miss him). But there are all kinds of actions I can take to better my life. Which is the only arena where I can effectively and meaningfully address my needs and my feelings. The court I must play in is my own.</p></blockquote><p></p>
[QUOTE="Copabanana, post: 716773, member: 18958"] The thing is: Even if we get strong and make better choices it supports the possibility of their changing. Only that. This forum is full of adult children who chose to live lives on the edge including my own son. Many of those parents are models of detachment. It mattered not at all in the choices of their kids, mainly sons. Why am I writing this mean thing? Because I (we) have to get it through my head that my son's stability and safety and productivity have nothing to do with what I choose. I just need to get out of his way. And make my life about me. The deep sorrow and longing I feel are not about him. (I do miss him). But there are all kinds of actions I can take to better my life. Which is the only arena where I can effectively and meaningfully address my needs and my feelings. The court I must play in is my own. [/QUOTE]
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