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<blockquote data-quote="nvts" data-source="post: 352266" data-attributes="member: 3814"><p>I've only been able to stop in to check on Marg's sister and some of the stuff that's been going on with all of you. It's been catch as catch can.</p><p> </p><p>Let's see...</p><p> </p><p>Last we heard from Beth, she'd told husband that he had to go...</p><p> </p><p>Well, he went. Sat. (the next morning after I dropped the bomb) he came down and announced that he was going to look at apartments. I said that's nice, but be careful about how much you spend because we're destitute. We talked about a few non-essential things and I guess when I didn't beg him to stay/for forgiveness/or him to get help, he was kind of shocked. Well, we started to talk, and I got the "I love you, but I'm not sure how...". Mmmm, hmmm. Here we go again. So I reassured him that while I love him, it's an abusive relationship, depressing, passive-aggressive, demoralizing and downright cruel and this was something that needed to be done for everyone who's being impacted by his behavior - including himself. He was tearful - but nothing I can't handle.</p><p> </p><p>Now, not being a cry baby here but here's a snapshot of what's been going on:</p><p> </p><p>had a miscarriage 3 yrs. ago- he was extremely helpful during it. Got home from the hospital with him at 4 am. Was told 24 hour bedrest. I got the kids up for school (6 am) while he called into work because he was too tired to go to work. Got a phone call at 9:am that difficult child 3 was having a meltdown and someone had to come get her. He wouldn't go. I had to drive (roundtrip) 20 miles to get her AND sit there and talk about the schools level of patience. I was getting short of breath, got her home and waited for the boys to get home (he's still in bed). Chest pain, shorter breath even still - OB/GYN tells me to hit the ER because I could have thrown a clot. He takes the kids (it's now 3:30 pm - I woke him up to take me) and I and drops me off at the ER. There until 1:00 am. No way to get home so I walk up and take the bus home IN THE RAIN. Wait for 40 mins. no sign of a bus, call my sister's cell and she's out so she'll pick me up.He's playing his video game when I arrive.</p><p> </p><p>Wouldn't attend difficult child 1's 5th grade graduation.</p><p> </p><p>Has 700+ hours logged on the video game.</p><p> </p><p>Never went to one prenatal exam/sonogram throughout the pregnancy with Evie (aka "Rabies" - she's biting EVERYTHING now!)</p><p> </p><p>Was in the hospital. for 9 days - he came once with the kids. Didn't see him/hear from him for the rest of the time I was in there. </p><p> </p><p>He took the 2 weeks off after Evie was born, his mother took care of the kids and he played the game. When I called work, (I didn't know he was off) they thought I was nuts.</p><p> </p><p>I got home, Evie was still in - he wouldn't take me to see her in the NICU - my sister did.</p><p> </p><p>She got out on day 11, his mom was getting ready to leave, but she stayed an extra week so she could give me a break once the baby came - he went back to work. I had a week break (with a csection) before I had to handle all 4 kids.</p><p> </p><p>But the game played on.</p><p> </p><p>There hasn't been ANY work done on the house for over 2 years. Yes, he built a deck for the pool, but managed to take the entire summer to do it (so that no one could come over).</p><p> </p><p>But the game prevailed!</p><p> </p><p>I could go on and on - Christmas? 20 mins. then up to the game. Evie's 1st birthday? Saw the cake, up to the game. My birthday? Card without a "Love, husband" just husband. I made hot dogs - he didn't join us - he was playing the game. Valentines? No love, just chocolate for the diabetic wife. Yahoo - but was yelling happy valentines to some bimbo on the video game.</p><p> </p><p>So, I think that this will do - for now. Tonight is the 1st night where it's just me, the difficult child's and Evie starting out new life out together...</p><p> </p><p>We're striking out on an adventure, the road may twist a little - but we'll do it together.</p><p> </p><p>Thanks for being so good to me - I really need you guys right now, so in deference to the way that husband signed my Birthday and Valentines Day cards, I proudly sign off...</p><p> </p><p>LOVE,</p><p>Beth</p><p><img src="data:image/gif;base64,R0lGODlhAQABAIAAAAAAAP///yH5BAEAAAAALAAAAAABAAEAAAIBRAA7" class="smilie smilie--sprite smilie--sprite2" alt=";)" title="Wink ;)" loading="lazy" data-shortname=";)" /></p></blockquote><p></p>
[QUOTE="nvts, post: 352266, member: 3814"] I've only been able to stop in to check on Marg's sister and some of the stuff that's been going on with all of you. It's been catch as catch can. Let's see... Last we heard from Beth, she'd told husband that he had to go... Well, he went. Sat. (the next morning after I dropped the bomb) he came down and announced that he was going to look at apartments. I said that's nice, but be careful about how much you spend because we're destitute. We talked about a few non-essential things and I guess when I didn't beg him to stay/for forgiveness/or him to get help, he was kind of shocked. Well, we started to talk, and I got the "I love you, but I'm not sure how...". Mmmm, hmmm. Here we go again. So I reassured him that while I love him, it's an abusive relationship, depressing, passive-aggressive, demoralizing and downright cruel and this was something that needed to be done for everyone who's being impacted by his behavior - including himself. He was tearful - but nothing I can't handle. Now, not being a cry baby here but here's a snapshot of what's been going on: had a miscarriage 3 yrs. ago- he was extremely helpful during it. Got home from the hospital with him at 4 am. Was told 24 hour bedrest. I got the kids up for school (6 am) while he called into work because he was too tired to go to work. Got a phone call at 9:am that difficult child 3 was having a meltdown and someone had to come get her. He wouldn't go. I had to drive (roundtrip) 20 miles to get her AND sit there and talk about the schools level of patience. I was getting short of breath, got her home and waited for the boys to get home (he's still in bed). Chest pain, shorter breath even still - OB/GYN tells me to hit the ER because I could have thrown a clot. He takes the kids (it's now 3:30 pm - I woke him up to take me) and I and drops me off at the ER. There until 1:00 am. No way to get home so I walk up and take the bus home IN THE RAIN. Wait for 40 mins. no sign of a bus, call my sister's cell and she's out so she'll pick me up.He's playing his video game when I arrive. Wouldn't attend difficult child 1's 5th grade graduation. Has 700+ hours logged on the video game. Never went to one prenatal exam/sonogram throughout the pregnancy with Evie (aka "Rabies" - she's biting EVERYTHING now!) Was in the hospital. for 9 days - he came once with the kids. Didn't see him/hear from him for the rest of the time I was in there. He took the 2 weeks off after Evie was born, his mother took care of the kids and he played the game. When I called work, (I didn't know he was off) they thought I was nuts. I got home, Evie was still in - he wouldn't take me to see her in the NICU - my sister did. She got out on day 11, his mom was getting ready to leave, but she stayed an extra week so she could give me a break once the baby came - he went back to work. I had a week break (with a csection) before I had to handle all 4 kids. But the game played on. There hasn't been ANY work done on the house for over 2 years. Yes, he built a deck for the pool, but managed to take the entire summer to do it (so that no one could come over). But the game prevailed! I could go on and on - Christmas? 20 mins. then up to the game. Evie's 1st birthday? Saw the cake, up to the game. My birthday? Card without a "Love, husband" just husband. I made hot dogs - he didn't join us - he was playing the game. Valentines? No love, just chocolate for the diabetic wife. Yahoo - but was yelling happy valentines to some bimbo on the video game. So, I think that this will do - for now. Tonight is the 1st night where it's just me, the difficult child's and Evie starting out new life out together... We're striking out on an adventure, the road may twist a little - but we'll do it together. Thanks for being so good to me - I really need you guys right now, so in deference to the way that husband signed my Birthday and Valentines Day cards, I proudly sign off... LOVE, Beth :winking: [/QUOTE]
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