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Speaking of holding open doors...
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<blockquote data-quote="TerryJ2" data-source="post: 188620" data-attributes="member: 3419"><p>I was reading a recent post by Wiped Out, about difficult child holding open a door, and thought of something I did the other day.</p><p>I am reading <strong>The Manipulative Child</strong> and how it takes two to tango, so to speak. For eg., when I allow difficult child to walk in front of me and zoom through the door, it is because I fear his arguing and bad attitude and want to avoid it. </p><p>So when we went to dinner the other night, I had him hold open the door for me, and I just took a deep breath when he argued about it. "Why do I have to open the door when you can open it for yourself? What is wrong with-you? Jeez."</p><p>I told him that it was a polite thing to do and he was going to learn to do it. (It's not like this is new. We've been through this in the past.)</p><p> </p><p>Next time, I will thank him for the last time he opened a door, and tell him that this time, we'll do it with-o complaining, so I'm going to up the ante.</p><p> </p><p>I'm thinking if we do little exercises like that often enough, he'll eventually do it automatically, plus, it trains me to turn a deaf ear to his complaints instead of getting me stressed out.</p><p> </p><p>The door is just one example. I have a long list of things he does to manipulate me.</p><p>Is this a good plan? Opinions?</p><p> </p><p>(I haven't finished the book yet, by the way. <img src="data:image/gif;base64,R0lGODlhAQABAIAAAAAAAP///yH5BAEAAAAALAAAAAABAAEAAAIBRAA7" class="smilie smilie--sprite smilie--sprite1" alt=":)" title="Smile :)" loading="lazy" data-shortname=":)" /> )</p></blockquote><p></p>
[QUOTE="TerryJ2, post: 188620, member: 3419"] I was reading a recent post by Wiped Out, about difficult child holding open a door, and thought of something I did the other day. I am reading [B]The Manipulative Child[/B] and how it takes two to tango, so to speak. For eg., when I allow difficult child to walk in front of me and zoom through the door, it is because I fear his arguing and bad attitude and want to avoid it. So when we went to dinner the other night, I had him hold open the door for me, and I just took a deep breath when he argued about it. "Why do I have to open the door when you can open it for yourself? What is wrong with-you? Jeez." I told him that it was a polite thing to do and he was going to learn to do it. (It's not like this is new. We've been through this in the past.) Next time, I will thank him for the last time he opened a door, and tell him that this time, we'll do it with-o complaining, so I'm going to up the ante. I'm thinking if we do little exercises like that often enough, he'll eventually do it automatically, plus, it trains me to turn a deaf ear to his complaints instead of getting me stressed out. The door is just one example. I have a long list of things he does to manipulate me. Is this a good plan? Opinions? (I haven't finished the book yet, by the way. :) ) [/QUOTE]
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