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Substance Abuse
Starting over again.....
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<blockquote data-quote="Kalahou" data-source="post: 684573" data-attributes="member: 19617"><p>Someone once told me that <em><u>“sincerity is no guarantee for truth”</u></em> … Actions are what speak and show the truth....</p><p></p><p>Hi Colleen,</p><p>I hope the situation is different for you. I truly hope this may be a turning point. But for myself, I heard these exact things and felt the exact way many times for many years. I truly believe my son was also sincere in all he kept saying he was going to do, he always meant well. It's just that he never got around to doing it. No supportive efforts and believing on my part did any good for any lasting time, but only enabled son's self-destructive tendencies to continue. I waited too long and kept <em>“believing him”</em> repeatedly … until finally now (when he is 36 years old) I am at last detaching and he is out of our home. And I know I cannot help him anymore in the same ways.</p><p></p><p>While I cannot berate myself for not realizing our enabling error sooner, at the same time I can’t help but think if I had detached 15 years ago, he might not be in jail right now.</p><p></p><p>It is repeatedly validated in many ways by many on this site that the detaching and stopping the enabling is what begins the new journey of freedom and growth for our difficult children.</p><p></p><p>You are not alone. There is so much support and comfort and strength on this site. Best Wishes, Kalahou</p></blockquote><p></p>
[QUOTE="Kalahou, post: 684573, member: 19617"] Someone once told me that [I][U]“sincerity is no guarantee for truth”[/U][/I] … Actions are what speak and show the truth.... Hi Colleen, I hope the situation is different for you. I truly hope this may be a turning point. But for myself, I heard these exact things and felt the exact way many times for many years. I truly believe my son was also sincere in all he kept saying he was going to do, he always meant well. It's just that he never got around to doing it. No supportive efforts and believing on my part did any good for any lasting time, but only enabled son's self-destructive tendencies to continue. I waited too long and kept [I]“believing him”[/I] repeatedly … until finally now (when he is 36 years old) I am at last detaching and he is out of our home. And I know I cannot help him anymore in the same ways. While I cannot berate myself for not realizing our enabling error sooner, at the same time I can’t help but think if I had detached 15 years ago, he might not be in jail right now. It is repeatedly validated in many ways by many on this site that the detaching and stopping the enabling is what begins the new journey of freedom and growth for our difficult children. You are not alone. There is so much support and comfort and strength on this site. Best Wishes, Kalahou [/QUOTE]
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