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<blockquote data-quote="Star*" data-source="post: 106060" data-attributes="member: 4964"><p>Lisa, </p><p>I'm so sorry you have to go through this. I can totally relate on every level. If it helps - you're doing the right thing by not buying into his sob story. My son was the worst he's ever been this year - it lead to me having a stroke. </p><p></p><p>I can tell you that there is a funk going around especially with difficult child parents. I've canceled holiday celebrations for about the same reasons you aren't having difficult child at your house. My son will find out tomorrow he will spend Christmas alone. So be it. I'm not faking my way though another celebration for the "sake" of childhood memories. Someone told me they think he'll live - I hope he does. </p><p></p><p>It isn't my hope to be an Ebenezer Scrooge stand in. I love Christmas. I love snow, packages, shopping, wrapping, baking, all of it. This year I'm just too worn out and that's okay. There will be no gifts for difficult child not because I wouldn't love to run out and get him things - but what is the point? It's never what he really wants, it's all mostly broken by New Years - and then he leaves the house to go who knows where and run with GOSH knows what doing - and see this is how I think. </p><p></p><p>There may be a chance that he comes home, has a delightful holiday with us, never leaves the yard, enjoys the meal, gets a gift - and in MY MIND that's what I see. But reality jerks a knot in my knickers and paints a VERY different picture. One I know will most likely be repeated because every year I hope for the best, get the worst and end up trying to FIND a shining star out of it so I can cope. </p><p></p><p>You aren't alone in your thoughts - just wanted you to know. </p><p></p><p>Many Big Hugs </p><p>Star</p></blockquote><p></p>
[QUOTE="Star*, post: 106060, member: 4964"] Lisa, I'm so sorry you have to go through this. I can totally relate on every level. If it helps - you're doing the right thing by not buying into his sob story. My son was the worst he's ever been this year - it lead to me having a stroke. I can tell you that there is a funk going around especially with difficult child parents. I've canceled holiday celebrations for about the same reasons you aren't having difficult child at your house. My son will find out tomorrow he will spend Christmas alone. So be it. I'm not faking my way though another celebration for the "sake" of childhood memories. Someone told me they think he'll live - I hope he does. It isn't my hope to be an Ebenezer Scrooge stand in. I love Christmas. I love snow, packages, shopping, wrapping, baking, all of it. This year I'm just too worn out and that's okay. There will be no gifts for difficult child not because I wouldn't love to run out and get him things - but what is the point? It's never what he really wants, it's all mostly broken by New Years - and then he leaves the house to go who knows where and run with GOSH knows what doing - and see this is how I think. There may be a chance that he comes home, has a delightful holiday with us, never leaves the yard, enjoys the meal, gets a gift - and in MY MIND that's what I see. But reality jerks a knot in my knickers and paints a VERY different picture. One I know will most likely be repeated because every year I hope for the best, get the worst and end up trying to FIND a shining star out of it so I can cope. You aren't alone in your thoughts - just wanted you to know. Many Big Hugs Star [/QUOTE]
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