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Parent Emeritus
Stuck in vortex of enabling and overgrown difficult child nightmare. Help. Please.
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<blockquote data-quote="toughlovin" data-source="post: 415002"><p>Bean, I am so sorry you are going through this and that your parents are enabling her. Remember the serenity prayer... they are part of what you cannot change. You need to do what takes care of you.. So the question is, what is good for you? Is it good for you not to talk to them for a week? If the answer is yes then don't talk to them!! If they call you to tell you what next thing they have done for her, or what she has asked of them or whatever, just say calmly, I wouldn't do that but it is your choice and your decision. Then change the subject or get off the phone. Don't engage with them about what they should or should not do... it is their decision as to how much they will do for her. In a sense they have to reach bottom with their enabling (kind of like the rest of us had to do that with our difficult children). BUT as I said earlier only talk to them if it is good for you in some way to do so. Right now make yourself and the rest of your family (not your parents) your priority.</p></blockquote><p></p>
[QUOTE="toughlovin, post: 415002"] Bean, I am so sorry you are going through this and that your parents are enabling her. Remember the serenity prayer... they are part of what you cannot change. You need to do what takes care of you.. So the question is, what is good for you? Is it good for you not to talk to them for a week? If the answer is yes then don't talk to them!! If they call you to tell you what next thing they have done for her, or what she has asked of them or whatever, just say calmly, I wouldn't do that but it is your choice and your decision. Then change the subject or get off the phone. Don't engage with them about what they should or should not do... it is their decision as to how much they will do for her. In a sense they have to reach bottom with their enabling (kind of like the rest of us had to do that with our difficult children). BUT as I said earlier only talk to them if it is good for you in some way to do so. Right now make yourself and the rest of your family (not your parents) your priority. [/QUOTE]
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Stuck in vortex of enabling and overgrown difficult child nightmare. Help. Please.
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