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<blockquote data-quote="applewoman" data-source="post: 300911" data-attributes="member: 7900"><p>Thanks for your replies. I have tried to do a signature... not sure how to add it! (sorry...new)</p><p>I dont want to rush into getting a psychiatric opinion. I am a professional myself... worked in mental health for years and now work with kids. I have no faith in what is available here. I have said to her that if she cuts herself again, we will have no choice but to seek help. Last time she did it, was at New Year - so maybe (please God) that will not come back. THe cannabis is a one off.... again - its normal teens experimentation - but needs watching? Its the loneliness and the inner despair that I dont knwo how to help.</p><p>She is by far the brightest of my 5 kids ( and youngest). She is highly articulate and academically able. She is brilliant at socialising. I have taken her to work with me today, and she has been workign alongside me with children with autism - and she is amazing. Someone commented today on what a great relationship we have - and she laughed! But I said to her when we were home, just how great she was and how proud I am of her and can we not keep that now we are home! But she got grunty and uncooperative with me here... weird. I dont get it. </p><p>ANyhow, Im not as tearful as I was a couple of days ago. its a great relief to be able to talk here, as its so hard with people who know me as it makes me feel such a failure. How come I can help others when I dont seem to be able to help the child I love so much? </p><p>I have just dropped her off at a friends house, and she is glad to be out and trusted for a while. She knows we have to build this up again, and thats fine. Its just I still dont know how to approach the lying etc... am I jsut being a soft touch if I just love her, give her all I can in terms of time and attention adn not beat her up for it anymore?? I told her the other day that I am not made of concrete - and that I have feelings just the same as her - dont know what to do sometimes, feel sad and hopeless that I cant make things better - I dont think she had thought about that before. Maybe its helped.</p><p>Thanks to all of you who replied. It helps so much.</p><p><img src="/community/styles/default/xenforo/smilies/peaceful.png" class="smilie" loading="lazy" alt=":peaceful:" title="peaceful :peaceful:" data-shortname=":peaceful:" /> Alison</p></blockquote><p></p>
[QUOTE="applewoman, post: 300911, member: 7900"] Thanks for your replies. I have tried to do a signature... not sure how to add it! (sorry...new) I dont want to rush into getting a psychiatric opinion. I am a professional myself... worked in mental health for years and now work with kids. I have no faith in what is available here. I have said to her that if she cuts herself again, we will have no choice but to seek help. Last time she did it, was at New Year - so maybe (please God) that will not come back. THe cannabis is a one off.... again - its normal teens experimentation - but needs watching? Its the loneliness and the inner despair that I dont knwo how to help. She is by far the brightest of my 5 kids ( and youngest). She is highly articulate and academically able. She is brilliant at socialising. I have taken her to work with me today, and she has been workign alongside me with children with autism - and she is amazing. Someone commented today on what a great relationship we have - and she laughed! But I said to her when we were home, just how great she was and how proud I am of her and can we not keep that now we are home! But she got grunty and uncooperative with me here... weird. I dont get it. ANyhow, Im not as tearful as I was a couple of days ago. its a great relief to be able to talk here, as its so hard with people who know me as it makes me feel such a failure. How come I can help others when I dont seem to be able to help the child I love so much? I have just dropped her off at a friends house, and she is glad to be out and trusted for a while. She knows we have to build this up again, and thats fine. Its just I still dont know how to approach the lying etc... am I jsut being a soft touch if I just love her, give her all I can in terms of time and attention adn not beat her up for it anymore?? I told her the other day that I am not made of concrete - and that I have feelings just the same as her - dont know what to do sometimes, feel sad and hopeless that I cant make things better - I dont think she had thought about that before. Maybe its helped. Thanks to all of you who replied. It helps so much. :peaceful: Alison [/QUOTE]
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