Tanya, I really appreciate what you said, but I'm really questioning if it IS up to him?
On one level, the one that I'm thinking is sociopathic and entitled, YES, it IS up to him. Then I wonder, does he have the capacity to decide? Is that the learned helplessness part? Where he is mind effing us all to get what he wants?
Or is he really unable to decide what IS up to him? I just don't know any more. Know what I mean?
