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The gods of irony
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<blockquote data-quote="barneysmom" data-source="post: 373006" data-attributes="member: 1872"><p>Hi Terry,</p><p></p><p>My first thought from the gut for your easy child was "Watch your boundaries." </p><p></p><p>I don't mean boundaries as a defense from C -- I mean that if it was me, I would have a hard time separating my responses from home, from how I responded to S at school. </p><p></p><p>It isn't anything to do specifically with C being an Aspie -- but it's the <u>same</u> <u>thing </u>that easy child deals with at home with her brother. I think I would be confused by that. in my opinion your easy child has no particular obligation to help C or her parents out at all, other than treating C with respect and dignity and a little more insight than most. Your easy child is there to study and have fun. </p><p></p><p>You can see from this post that the subject is triggering <u>me</u> a little bit. </p><p></p><p>Anyway I think that if easy child thought about her boundaries ahead of time, maybe journaled about them -- not about boundaries from AS, but about her boundaries as a person. This is one of my personal journeys -- if I'm not paying attention to my boundaries, I'll quickly fall into old patterns of enabling, people-pleasing or being triggered by something that has nothing to do with the current situation. </p><p></p><p>Anyway. Obviously something personal with me (was that a people-pleasing remark?)</p><p></p><p>P.S. I just re-read this thread more carefully and realized I'm repeating the same advice you got from everyone else. Oh well.</p></blockquote><p></p>
[QUOTE="barneysmom, post: 373006, member: 1872"] Hi Terry, My first thought from the gut for your easy child was "Watch your boundaries." I don't mean boundaries as a defense from C -- I mean that if it was me, I would have a hard time separating my responses from home, from how I responded to S at school. It isn't anything to do specifically with C being an Aspie -- but it's the [U]same[/U] [U]thing [/U]that easy child deals with at home with her brother. I think I would be confused by that. in my opinion your easy child has no particular obligation to help C or her parents out at all, other than treating C with respect and dignity and a little more insight than most. Your easy child is there to study and have fun. You can see from this post that the subject is triggering [U]me[/U] a little bit. Anyway I think that if easy child thought about her boundaries ahead of time, maybe journaled about them -- not about boundaries from AS, but about her boundaries as a person. This is one of my personal journeys -- if I'm not paying attention to my boundaries, I'll quickly fall into old patterns of enabling, people-pleasing or being triggered by something that has nothing to do with the current situation. Anyway. Obviously something personal with me (was that a people-pleasing remark?) P.S. I just re-read this thread more carefully and realized I'm repeating the same advice you got from everyone else. Oh well. [/QUOTE]
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