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<blockquote data-quote="recoveringenabler" data-source="post: 602460" data-attributes="member: 13542"><p>Thank you Barbara, you're very kind. I wholeheartedly agree, if we can move through this territory and emerge, certainly changed, but with a new vigor for our own lives, for our own story, for our own excitement and joy, then anyone can. It is hard work, as you know and yes, "i<em>t <span style="color: #000000">is a series of small, everyday choices that eventually finds us viewing the events of our lives from a whole different mountaintop." </span></em><span style="color: #000000"> Beautifully said Barbara, it is indeed small choices everyday which add up to deep and profound changes that take us away from the chaos.</span></p><p><span style="color: #000000"></span></p><p><span style="color: #000000"></span><span style="color: #000000">An example of that is yesterday SO and I were on our way home from a drive talking about something related to difficult child. In a short time I realized that in talking about her, I did not have that stressed feeling in my stomach, I was not imagining her sad and dejected, it was as if there was a mute button on feelings and imagination in terms of my daughter. I looked at SO and said, "I'm free." It was an odd feeling, of course, just as if I were speaking about a neighbor or someone fairly distant. It isn't that I don't love her or always wish for her happiness, it was more that I felt detached, no emotional component working overtime to pull me away from myself. It's as if this process has made my core self very strong, with very clear boundaries, very clear 'truths' which will keep me out of the fray. </span></p><p></p><p><span style="color: #000000">Another interesting result is that in having to so clearly pinpoint manipulations, lies, different ways people try to get what they need in unpleasant or negative ways, in stopping bad behavior in my own personal sphere, it's opened my eyes to this all around me. I am not tolerant of being treated or addressed in any manner which is not only respectful but is reciprocal, trustworthy, loving and healthy. I am more able to see this in others now, see it in all my environments and interactions. In working so hard to heal myself, I developed a sense of self that is in many ways more tolerant and compassionate, yet conversely much less tolerant for bad behavior. It's just not okay to step over certain lines and now those lines are crystal clear. In that respect, it is a sort of a blessing underneath the suffering, to know myself and be true to myself..........</span></p><p><span style="color: #000000"></span></p><p><span style="color: #000000">I'm holding up my glass of green juice in a toast to you Barbara and to all peaceful warriors.......</span></p></blockquote><p></p>
[QUOTE="recoveringenabler, post: 602460, member: 13542"] Thank you Barbara, you're very kind. I wholeheartedly agree, if we can move through this territory and emerge, certainly changed, but with a new vigor for our own lives, for our own story, for our own excitement and joy, then anyone can. It is hard work, as you know and yes, "i[I]t [COLOR=#000000]is a series of small, everyday choices that eventually finds us viewing the events of our lives from a whole different mountaintop." [/COLOR][/I][COLOR=#000000] Beautifully said Barbara, it is indeed small choices everyday which add up to deep and profound changes that take us away from the chaos. [/COLOR][COLOR=#000000]An example of that is yesterday SO and I were on our way home from a drive talking about something related to difficult child. In a short time I realized that in talking about her, I did not have that stressed feeling in my stomach, I was not imagining her sad and dejected, it was as if there was a mute button on feelings and imagination in terms of my daughter. I looked at SO and said, "I'm free." It was an odd feeling, of course, just as if I were speaking about a neighbor or someone fairly distant. It isn't that I don't love her or always wish for her happiness, it was more that I felt detached, no emotional component working overtime to pull me away from myself. It's as if this process has made my core self very strong, with very clear boundaries, very clear 'truths' which will keep me out of the fray. [/COLOR] [COLOR=#000000]Another interesting result is that in having to so clearly pinpoint manipulations, lies, different ways people try to get what they need in unpleasant or negative ways, in stopping bad behavior in my own personal sphere, it's opened my eyes to this all around me. I am not tolerant of being treated or addressed in any manner which is not only respectful but is reciprocal, trustworthy, loving and healthy. I am more able to see this in others now, see it in all my environments and interactions. In working so hard to heal myself, I developed a sense of self that is in many ways more tolerant and compassionate, yet conversely much less tolerant for bad behavior. It's just not okay to step over certain lines and now those lines are crystal clear. In that respect, it is a sort of a blessing underneath the suffering, to know myself and be true to myself.......... I'm holding up my glass of green juice in a toast to you Barbara and to all peaceful warriors.......[/COLOR] [/QUOTE]
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