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The Roller Coaster of Miss KT
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<blockquote data-quote="Star*" data-source="post: 362638" data-attributes="member: 4964"><p>Whenever your adult kids do this - "chow chow chow" walk? Allow yourself to think like a difficult child and THEN respond......</p><p> </p><p>I want to drive to Illinois to see this college I may or may NOT go to. (you in the back of your mind know/suspect there is an alterior motive for driving ALL THAT WAY - JUST to see??? A college?") </p><p>So you respond in your mind - "WHAT IS IN IT FOR ME?" </p><p>Then think - what could you do why she is doing the chow chow chow dance.....</p><p>(Shop? Sightsee? Take in a show? Get a mani-pedi and a brazillian wax?) </p><p>If the answer in your mind is a big fat ZERO? Then begin responding with the words "NO....." </p><p>Of course your difficult child will fire back - uglieness like "WHY NOT? WHATS WRONG WITH YOU? HERE I GO TRYING TO PUT MY LIFE TOGETHER AND YOU WONT HELP." </p><p>You fire back (calmly) - "Well because I will be bored and there will be nothing for ME to do. (and it's all about you now), Nothing is wrong with me....I don't want to be bored, or Well sweetie that's just it - it's YOUR life. You need to do what is best for you. I'm here for support if you need me, but I can't see taking an entire day out of MY life - for plans you haven't made solid. You go - have fun....let me know how it turns out." </p><p> </p><p>I swear - I'm happier since learning these things, and applying them to conversations with teenagers. You respond in a manner they are <em><u><span style="color: blue">accustomed</span></u></em> to - me factor to the nth degree. <img src="/community/styles/default/xenforo/smilies/tongue.png" class="smilie" loading="lazy" alt=":tongue:" title="tongue :tongue:" data-shortname=":tongue:" /></p></blockquote><p></p>
[QUOTE="Star*, post: 362638, member: 4964"] Whenever your adult kids do this - "chow chow chow" walk? Allow yourself to think like a difficult child and THEN respond...... I want to drive to Illinois to see this college I may or may NOT go to. (you in the back of your mind know/suspect there is an alterior motive for driving ALL THAT WAY - JUST to see??? A college?") So you respond in your mind - "WHAT IS IN IT FOR ME?" Then think - what could you do why she is doing the chow chow chow dance..... (Shop? Sightsee? Take in a show? Get a mani-pedi and a brazillian wax?) If the answer in your mind is a big fat ZERO? Then begin responding with the words "NO....." Of course your difficult child will fire back - uglieness like "WHY NOT? WHATS WRONG WITH YOU? HERE I GO TRYING TO PUT MY LIFE TOGETHER AND YOU WONT HELP." You fire back (calmly) - "Well because I will be bored and there will be nothing for ME to do. (and it's all about you now), Nothing is wrong with me....I don't want to be bored, or Well sweetie that's just it - it's YOUR life. You need to do what is best for you. I'm here for support if you need me, but I can't see taking an entire day out of MY life - for plans you haven't made solid. You go - have fun....let me know how it turns out." I swear - I'm happier since learning these things, and applying them to conversations with teenagers. You respond in a manner they are [I][U][COLOR=blue]accustomed[/COLOR][/U][/I] to - me factor to the nth degree. :raspberry-tounge: [/QUOTE]
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