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The son who disowned his family (us) comes back to haunt my daughter.
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<blockquote data-quote="BusynMember" data-source="post: 565972" data-attributes="member: 1550"><p>I blamed myself for S's choices for a long time and felt I must have done something Hideous to cause him to want out. Then I had the fantastic luck of finding a great psychologist who studies adopted children and only has adopted children as his patients. I had heard about him, but he is so popular I never though I'd get in. But when he heard my story, he saw me and we talked and talked for several sessions.</p><p></p><p>In his opinion, adoption of S. at age six was too late to have him truly bond to us because a child's personality forms in his first three years. He believes S. has the whole nine yards of reactive attachment disorder, but, due to his stupendously high IQ, was able to model "normal" behavior for many years until something happened within him, and he imploded. S. has had a IQ tested at over 140. He always worked up to his ability level and achieved so well and his father burst with pride. The fact that he was a great liar, due to his IQ, made his brother, Sportsfan, the culprit often when he wasn't. </p><p></p><p></p><p></p><p>I believe S. has to have severe reactive attachment to be able to totally turn away from those who loved him from age six to twenty-five. As soon as he met K., his wife, he immediately turned away from us and toward her and she, frankly, didn't care for us. In fact, she gave us a creepy feeling, although we never said that to S. and I feel we acted very nice to her. So I don't really know what was going on in his head, but I do believe he couldn't love more than one family at one time and was overly sensitive about what he considered horrible blights. Most would simply roll their eyes at the things he cared about. Other things never even happened. </p><p></p><p>I believe six years old is old to adopt a child. I do not know if I could have emotionally removed myself from any of my other children as much as I have from S. Then again, none ever rejected all of us so badly or with such ridicule and finality. I am sorry things worked out this way, but don't think about him much anymore, except at times like this when my dear daughter is hurt all over again by her idiot father. </p><p></p><p>I think father had his one chance to make it work and hopefully he saw that it never will. I want him to leave my daughter alone. She has been through a lot and come out the right way and is doing so well and I think he should be very proud of her. by the way, if anyone cares, my daughter will be on WGN tomorrow, 9CST, showing people how to make a cake that looks like it is tied with a bow. At least *I* am very proud of her!</p></blockquote><p></p>
[QUOTE="BusynMember, post: 565972, member: 1550"] I blamed myself for S's choices for a long time and felt I must have done something Hideous to cause him to want out. Then I had the fantastic luck of finding a great psychologist who studies adopted children and only has adopted children as his patients. I had heard about him, but he is so popular I never though I'd get in. But when he heard my story, he saw me and we talked and talked for several sessions. In his opinion, adoption of S. at age six was too late to have him truly bond to us because a child's personality forms in his first three years. He believes S. has the whole nine yards of reactive attachment disorder, but, due to his stupendously high IQ, was able to model "normal" behavior for many years until something happened within him, and he imploded. S. has had a IQ tested at over 140. He always worked up to his ability level and achieved so well and his father burst with pride. The fact that he was a great liar, due to his IQ, made his brother, Sportsfan, the culprit often when he wasn't. I believe S. has to have severe reactive attachment to be able to totally turn away from those who loved him from age six to twenty-five. As soon as he met K., his wife, he immediately turned away from us and toward her and she, frankly, didn't care for us. In fact, she gave us a creepy feeling, although we never said that to S. and I feel we acted very nice to her. So I don't really know what was going on in his head, but I do believe he couldn't love more than one family at one time and was overly sensitive about what he considered horrible blights. Most would simply roll their eyes at the things he cared about. Other things never even happened. I believe six years old is old to adopt a child. I do not know if I could have emotionally removed myself from any of my other children as much as I have from S. Then again, none ever rejected all of us so badly or with such ridicule and finality. I am sorry things worked out this way, but don't think about him much anymore, except at times like this when my dear daughter is hurt all over again by her idiot father. I think father had his one chance to make it work and hopefully he saw that it never will. I want him to leave my daughter alone. She has been through a lot and come out the right way and is doing so well and I think he should be very proud of her. by the way, if anyone cares, my daughter will be on WGN tomorrow, 9CST, showing people how to make a cake that looks like it is tied with a bow. At least *I* am very proud of her! [/QUOTE]
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The son who disowned his family (us) comes back to haunt my daughter.
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