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Parent Emeritus
The x - Dude and the first phone call /13 years
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<blockquote data-quote="lovemysons" data-source="post: 263362" data-attributes="member: 3305"><p>Star, Just wanted to add too that perhaps your "Dude" may have a MUCH healthier interpretation of why bio dad wasn't there for him than I did as a teen. </p><p></p><p>I turned it inward on self and thought that there must have been something about ME that was unimportant, not significant enough, not WORTHY of being loved well by him. Of course I know today that none of that was true...but you know how children/teens can be, thinking it was something about them. </p><p></p><p>Today I know that my bio dad lacked the capacity to love, to reach out, to care, to give to ANYONE well...not just me. That being a self absorbed alcoholic/addict means that "drug of choice" comes before any and all. </p><p></p><p>Anyway, Hopefully your dude is better grounded in his interpretation of things than I was as a teen. I know you will be there to help him understand, put things in perspective, if when needed. </p><p></p><p>Tammy</p></blockquote><p></p>
[QUOTE="lovemysons, post: 263362, member: 3305"] Star, Just wanted to add too that perhaps your "Dude" may have a MUCH healthier interpretation of why bio dad wasn't there for him than I did as a teen. I turned it inward on self and thought that there must have been something about ME that was unimportant, not significant enough, not WORTHY of being loved well by him. Of course I know today that none of that was true...but you know how children/teens can be, thinking it was something about them. Today I know that my bio dad lacked the capacity to love, to reach out, to care, to give to ANYONE well...not just me. That being a self absorbed alcoholic/addict means that "drug of choice" comes before any and all. Anyway, Hopefully your dude is better grounded in his interpretation of things than I was as a teen. I know you will be there to help him understand, put things in perspective, if when needed. Tammy [/QUOTE]
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The x - Dude and the first phone call /13 years
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