Forums
New posts
Search forums
What's new
New posts
New profile posts
Latest activity
Internet Search
Members
Current visitors
New profile posts
Search profile posts
Log in
Register
What's new
Search
Search
Search titles only
By:
New posts
Search forums
Menu
Log in
Register
Install the app
Install
Forums
Parent Support Forums
General Parenting
therapist Finally Heard Me!
JavaScript is disabled. For a better experience, please enable JavaScript in your browser before proceeding.
You are using an out of date browser. It may not display this or other websites correctly.
You should upgrade or use an
alternative browser
.
Reply to thread
Message
<blockquote data-quote="aeroeng" data-source="post: 387875" data-attributes="member: 6557"><p>My difficult child was the same way. Perfect at school and an exploding monster at home. When I asked his teachers how his behavior was they would look confused, why would I even ask the questions? This is difficult child of course his behavior is fine? Yet at home! horrible! His psychiatrist said that just because he could hold it together at school we should not feel that he was capable to hold it together at home. The pressure builds up inside and he needs to vent. He also stated that he vented for us, because he knew our love was unconditional and he felt more at ease to release it. (nice reward hu?) The psychiatrist also stated that his ability to hold it together at school was a very positive sign and that it would help him to learn to hold it together for the rest of the time.</p><p></p><p>Since then (last two years) difficult child has improved tremendously. He still gets angry, and he still tries to manipulate us. (particularly is younger brother). But when he gets angry he is more likely to simply go to his room for 15 minutes and then returns and apologies. Two years ago it would have built up until it got violent. Now he is learning to let it go. We are not completely where we want to be with him, but moving in that direction.</p><p></p><p>Things that helped us get here?</p><p>- Learning to control how we responded by using techniques the therapist taught us. (consistent with Green's book)</p><p>- Time away from the family with his uncle who has experiences as a foster parent.</p><p>- difficult child maturing and growing out of that high level of hormones. </p><p>- Frequently separating the kids.</p><p>- Getting difficult child interested in a team sport. (burns up all that energy, and he is too tired when he comes home. Does his homework and then falls a sleep. His grades are even better or else he's off the team. We don't have to say anything)</p><p>- Putting away all the physical things I care about, so I can respond less. (I'll get them back some day for now difficult child's mental health is more important)</p><p>- HD and I support each other even when we think the other is not totally correct. </p><p>- Learning how to rest and relax even when all you get is 5 mins in the bathroom.</p></blockquote><p></p>
[QUOTE="aeroeng, post: 387875, member: 6557"] My difficult child was the same way. Perfect at school and an exploding monster at home. When I asked his teachers how his behavior was they would look confused, why would I even ask the questions? This is difficult child of course his behavior is fine? Yet at home! horrible! His psychiatrist said that just because he could hold it together at school we should not feel that he was capable to hold it together at home. The pressure builds up inside and he needs to vent. He also stated that he vented for us, because he knew our love was unconditional and he felt more at ease to release it. (nice reward hu?) The psychiatrist also stated that his ability to hold it together at school was a very positive sign and that it would help him to learn to hold it together for the rest of the time. Since then (last two years) difficult child has improved tremendously. He still gets angry, and he still tries to manipulate us. (particularly is younger brother). But when he gets angry he is more likely to simply go to his room for 15 minutes and then returns and apologies. Two years ago it would have built up until it got violent. Now he is learning to let it go. We are not completely where we want to be with him, but moving in that direction. Things that helped us get here? - Learning to control how we responded by using techniques the therapist taught us. (consistent with Green's book) - Time away from the family with his uncle who has experiences as a foster parent. - difficult child maturing and growing out of that high level of hormones. - Frequently separating the kids. - Getting difficult child interested in a team sport. (burns up all that energy, and he is too tired when he comes home. Does his homework and then falls a sleep. His grades are even better or else he's off the team. We don't have to say anything) - Putting away all the physical things I care about, so I can respond less. (I'll get them back some day for now difficult child's mental health is more important) - HD and I support each other even when we think the other is not totally correct. - Learning how to rest and relax even when all you get is 5 mins in the bathroom. [/QUOTE]
Insert quotes…
Verification
Post reply
Forums
Parent Support Forums
General Parenting
therapist Finally Heard Me!
Top