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General Parenting
therapist supports Aspergers diagnosis
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<blockquote data-quote="Marguerite" data-source="post: 351754" data-attributes="member: 1991"><p>That's good news. And very validating.</p><p></p><p>As for husband not anting him to change - it's OK to say that, but I agree with you, it's not OK to say that in context of "I hope THEY don't change you."</p><p></p><p>Share this with difficult child and husband - the line we took with our kids was, "You have Asperger's (or autism). It just means that your brain works a different way. We need variety in tis world, your autism means you do things a particular way that works for you. Sometimes we need help to find a better way to teach you to do things, so your brain can find it easier. Also, some things will be a lot easier for you than for other people. Other things are likely to be more difficult. You will always be who you are and we love you as you are. But as with any child who has to learn to live in this world and learn how to do things, you need to learn these things too. And you are able to learn these things although you might need a bit more help with some (and no help with others!). It's our job as parents to find out where you need help to learn and to make sure you get that help. But you will always be who you are and we will always love you as you are."</p><p></p><p>Our kids have grown up valuing themselves with their autism as part of the picture, part of who they are. It is not a handicap in our home, it does sometimes bring a problem or two that we need to find a way around. But in itself, the autism is just another aspect, such as having brown eyes. Beautiful coffee-sugar brown eyes...</p><p></p><p>Marg</p></blockquote><p></p>
[QUOTE="Marguerite, post: 351754, member: 1991"] That's good news. And very validating. As for husband not anting him to change - it's OK to say that, but I agree with you, it's not OK to say that in context of "I hope THEY don't change you." Share this with difficult child and husband - the line we took with our kids was, "You have Asperger's (or autism). It just means that your brain works a different way. We need variety in tis world, your autism means you do things a particular way that works for you. Sometimes we need help to find a better way to teach you to do things, so your brain can find it easier. Also, some things will be a lot easier for you than for other people. Other things are likely to be more difficult. You will always be who you are and we love you as you are. But as with any child who has to learn to live in this world and learn how to do things, you need to learn these things too. And you are able to learn these things although you might need a bit more help with some (and no help with others!). It's our job as parents to find out where you need help to learn and to make sure you get that help. But you will always be who you are and we will always love you as you are." Our kids have grown up valuing themselves with their autism as part of the picture, part of who they are. It is not a handicap in our home, it does sometimes bring a problem or two that we need to find a way around. But in itself, the autism is just another aspect, such as having brown eyes. Beautiful coffee-sugar brown eyes... Marg [/QUOTE]
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therapist supports Aspergers diagnosis
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