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<blockquote data-quote="ckay87" data-source="post: 753137" data-attributes="member: 24067"><p>Oh it's not your fault!! I mean, I get you. I go over things too and there were definitely things I could have done better. My son's father and I fought a lot and never should have stayed (or even gotten) married. But the kids had a nice, modest home. We gave them a TON of support and attention without giving them too much material things.... bla bla bla. At the end of the day, you and I did our best. Many, many, many children grow up in homes where that is not at all the case. I'd bet there are kids who grew up in crack houses who are thriving better than mine are.</p><p></p><p>I, too, am surrounded by friends whose kids are at the top of their game. How can I talk to them? I recently lamented to husband and wife friends of ours about what I'm going through. And the husband said something about how they don't have problems like that because they were so strict with their son and they really concentrated all their energy on raising him. Do you have any idea what a slap in the face that is to someone who has done the exact same and who deals with a drastically different outcome?</p><p></p><p>And my boyfriend is wonderful, but I don't talk to him much about the topic. He'll ask how my boys are and I'll start talking and immediately feel like I'm losing IQ points just by trying to explain their trainwrecks. lol. I'll say... if this all sounds stupid, that's because it IS. </p><p></p><p>Anyway....yes to the therapist.</p></blockquote><p></p>
[QUOTE="ckay87, post: 753137, member: 24067"] Oh it's not your fault!! I mean, I get you. I go over things too and there were definitely things I could have done better. My son's father and I fought a lot and never should have stayed (or even gotten) married. But the kids had a nice, modest home. We gave them a TON of support and attention without giving them too much material things.... bla bla bla. At the end of the day, you and I did our best. Many, many, many children grow up in homes where that is not at all the case. I'd bet there are kids who grew up in crack houses who are thriving better than mine are. I, too, am surrounded by friends whose kids are at the top of their game. How can I talk to them? I recently lamented to husband and wife friends of ours about what I'm going through. And the husband said something about how they don't have problems like that because they were so strict with their son and they really concentrated all their energy on raising him. Do you have any idea what a slap in the face that is to someone who has done the exact same and who deals with a drastically different outcome? And my boyfriend is wonderful, but I don't talk to him much about the topic. He'll ask how my boys are and I'll start talking and immediately feel like I'm losing IQ points just by trying to explain their trainwrecks. lol. I'll say... if this all sounds stupid, that's because it IS. Anyway....yes to the therapist. [/QUOTE]
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