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Substance Abuse
This sums up my feelings pretty well
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<blockquote data-quote="Copabanana" data-source="post: 748666" data-attributes="member: 18958"><p>My son as far as I know has not used hard drugs. Marijuana and psychedelics, yes.</p><p></p><p>When I kicked out my son he was not using anything, consistently. He gave the appearance of normal. He looked pretty clean cut.</p><p></p><p>The hoody, the marijuana, the homelessness, the volatility were still to come.</p><p></p><p>Did I create that? Had I found a way to motivate him could this all have been averted? I don't know. Maybe so. I listened to people that J only had to face reality and grow up. And he would do that by having to respond to real world contingencies. I was wrong.</p><p></p><p>In retrospect I wish I had done what SWOT did, arrange a support system. Up front acknowledge that her son needed SDI/SSI. But would my son have accepted this, as did Sonic who seems cooperative and tractable? I don't know.</p><p></p><p>The thing is this isn't over until it's over. My son has an independent streak. (That is he wants to call the shots while relying upon the good will and resources of somebody else.) </p><p>From my work in prisons, I know that all of this can be turned around. What lingers is the psychosis, but in time that dissipates for most. Their humanity returns. And with it great shame and regret. And quite often, the intention to live well.</p><p></p><p>And I see people in my community who have recovered. I know it happens. The catalysts, seem to be something severe and serious.</p><p>I think this is wise. Accepting reality.</p><p></p><p>From what I have heard about with CRAFT (remember LBL's son was involved with Craft until he was able to get into that program, and remember how frustrated she was and how hard it was, he was abusive and defiant and out of control in her house, and stole from them--and that was over a period of a months, and he was only 18)...your girls are WOMEN. More than twice his age. Nobody is saying to not be kind, to be open to change. But to be consumed. To be destroyed. Who does this serve? </p><p></p><p>You have children and grandchildren, New Leaf. How could you put them in the circumstance of further involvement with this man, in particular, however peripheral? I don't see how.</p></blockquote><p></p>
[QUOTE="Copabanana, post: 748666, member: 18958"] My son as far as I know has not used hard drugs. Marijuana and psychedelics, yes. When I kicked out my son he was not using anything, consistently. He gave the appearance of normal. He looked pretty clean cut. The hoody, the marijuana, the homelessness, the volatility were still to come. Did I create that? Had I found a way to motivate him could this all have been averted? I don't know. Maybe so. I listened to people that J only had to face reality and grow up. And he would do that by having to respond to real world contingencies. I was wrong. In retrospect I wish I had done what SWOT did, arrange a support system. Up front acknowledge that her son needed SDI/SSI. But would my son have accepted this, as did Sonic who seems cooperative and tractable? I don't know. The thing is this isn't over until it's over. My son has an independent streak. (That is he wants to call the shots while relying upon the good will and resources of somebody else.) From my work in prisons, I know that all of this can be turned around. What lingers is the psychosis, but in time that dissipates for most. Their humanity returns. And with it great shame and regret. And quite often, the intention to live well. And I see people in my community who have recovered. I know it happens. The catalysts, seem to be something severe and serious. I think this is wise. Accepting reality. From what I have heard about with CRAFT (remember LBL's son was involved with Craft until he was able to get into that program, and remember how frustrated she was and how hard it was, he was abusive and defiant and out of control in her house, and stole from them--and that was over a period of a months, and he was only 18)...your girls are WOMEN. More than twice his age. Nobody is saying to not be kind, to be open to change. But to be consumed. To be destroyed. Who does this serve? You have children and grandchildren, New Leaf. How could you put them in the circumstance of further involvement with this man, in particular, however peripheral? I don't see how. [/QUOTE]
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This sums up my feelings pretty well
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