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Thoughts on a will
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<blockquote data-quote="Kathy813" data-source="post: 706745" data-attributes="member: 1967"><p>My husband and I recently had a will made. We struggled with how to handle it but are happy with what we decided. First of all, we have spent a huge amount on rehabs, halfway houses, rent, etc for our difficult child over the last 13 years. It just didn't seem fair to leave what we had left split equally between our two daughters.</p><p></p><p>So we stipulated that an equal amount of what we had spent on Difficult Child would go to our youngest daughter. What was left after that would be split between the two. We also stipulated that any amount that went to our oldest daughter (Difficult Child) would be split in thirds given now, at 35, and at 40. After that, she is on her own with it. My best friend agreed to be the person in charge of dispersing the money so that difficult child wouldn't badger our younger daughter to give her the money.</p><p></p><p>We did that hoping it would keep her from spending it all immediately and hoping by 40 she would be more responsible with money.</p><p></p><p>We were very up front and explained exactly what we had done with both daughters. Difficult child took it very well.</p><p></p><p>We are very fortunate that Difficult Child is doing very well. She will celebrate her 11 month sobriety date on February 1st and is doing great at her full time job. I am cautiously optimistic. But regardless of what happens, once I am gone I won't know if she squanders the money and it won't be my problem.</p></blockquote><p></p>
[QUOTE="Kathy813, post: 706745, member: 1967"] My husband and I recently had a will made. We struggled with how to handle it but are happy with what we decided. First of all, we have spent a huge amount on rehabs, halfway houses, rent, etc for our difficult child over the last 13 years. It just didn't seem fair to leave what we had left split equally between our two daughters. So we stipulated that an equal amount of what we had spent on Difficult Child would go to our youngest daughter. What was left after that would be split between the two. We also stipulated that any amount that went to our oldest daughter (Difficult Child) would be split in thirds given now, at 35, and at 40. After that, she is on her own with it. My best friend agreed to be the person in charge of dispersing the money so that difficult child wouldn't badger our younger daughter to give her the money. We did that hoping it would keep her from spending it all immediately and hoping by 40 she would be more responsible with money. We were very up front and explained exactly what we had done with both daughters. Difficult child took it very well. We are very fortunate that Difficult Child is doing very well. She will celebrate her 11 month sobriety date on February 1st and is doing great at her full time job. I am cautiously optimistic. But regardless of what happens, once I am gone I won't know if she squanders the money and it won't be my problem. [/QUOTE]
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