Leave it to husband. You handed school stuff over, I do think it's the only way for now. Look after yourself. Opt out. I agree with emailing rather than ringing, I also agree that you can't change what can't be changed right now. You can't have that perfect child - he is what he is, complete with his load of problems. he didn't cause those problems and he's not coping either.
Reward/non reward - husband can sort it now. If he gives in and give difficult child what he wants, then let husband deal with the problems this causes when HE feels a reward is due.
I do think it really is the only way. And while you're so stressed and tired, you can't be as good a parent as you need to be. Look after yourself for now. get strong, get well and dump the guilt in a deep quarry.
Marg
