The real world doesn't care, but to take that step to get help, as an adult, in the real world, you have to have SOME sense of being loved and cared for unconditionally. The real world will throw you in jail for outrageous behavior so, I feel, that, as a child, rather than stressing on consequences that the child can't (not won't, but can't) meet, it's best to do all you can--throw your energy--into getting HELP. Otherwise that adult is going to step into a hostile world UNSTABLE and no better equipped to handle things than he does now. I didn't get stable because I turned 18. I got stable on medications. It was a long road and I fortunately WANTED to get help and never gave up. All this aside, klj, you need a therapist, sweetie. You need somebody on your side that you can talk to face-to-face. Call the County Mental Health Dept. if you don't have a therapist to talk to in your insurance network. Join a self-help group for parents of mentally ill children (I feel self-help groups helped me more than any therapist I ever saw.) These are people going through what you are and probably have good suggestions about what to do IN YOUR COMMUNITY. in my opinion, don't fight with husband. You create more stress. He may have decided that it's just not worth it to fight with this child over everything. I agree with him. Why wear yourself out? Is it changing your kid? It IS making YOU a nervous wreck.You can't force husband to do things your way. Please, please, please look for both a therapist and a self-help group. There ARE people around who will care and you won't feel so alone. (((Hugs)))
