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<blockquote data-quote="ANewLife4Me" data-source="post: 765213" data-attributes="member: 32799"><p>Wow healinginside you have floored me! Thank you so very, very much! <img class="smilie smilie--emoji" loading="lazy" alt="🤗" title="Hugging face :hugging:" src="https://cdn.jsdelivr.net/joypixels/assets/6.6/png/unicode/64/1f917.png" data-shortname=":hugging:" /></p><p></p><p>It’s amazing you are having the very same issue and thoughts about a child in jail, I am so very sorry that we have this in common but am so grateful for your concern. </p><p></p><p>You and I need to keep each other strong! Please reach out to me if you just need to chat more in depth. <img class="smilie smilie--emoji" loading="lazy" alt="😊" title="Smiling face with smiling eyes :blush:" src="https://cdn.jsdelivr.net/joypixels/assets/6.6/png/unicode/64/1f60a.png" data-shortname=":blush:" /> Each court hearing puts me on edge and makes me so nervous, will say an extra prayer for you today. I am very happy though to read you are going to focus on yourself and your needs, am SO proud of you! <img class="smilie smilie--emoji" loading="lazy" alt="❤️" title="Red heart :heart:" src="https://cdn.jsdelivr.net/joypixels/assets/6.6/png/unicode/64/2764.png" data-shortname=":heart:" /> You mentioned this was his first time in jail and yet here you are, letting him receive the full impact of his actions. I don’t wish a sentence on my daughter as well but it keeps her longer off the streets and longer of her not coming to my house. We don’t want this of course, worst thing we can imagine, it’s hard to think of anything bad for our children. You asked why does this happen to us? What causes mental issues and what did we do wrong? I know for a fact that we are caring, loving, wonderful parents who while not perfect and made a few mistakes….we gave them heart, body and soul. They and I repeat THEY made these choices, there is nothing we could have done or said to change the outcome. As far as mental issues, certainly have no control over that, it’s a brain issue and I also believe in the genes. My family has a huge history of mental illness. Why we have to suffer so, I will never understand that one, have to believe that He will step in when I can bear no more. You have made the decision to not let him live with you ever again as I have with mine. This is such torture thinking upon what the streets are actually like but, this is another lesson they will have to find for themselves and I must come to peace about that as this time it’s for me, it’s for you….we deserve a life that we gave away YEARS on helping them. We did not fail and possibly their mental has not helped their situation but, they can take medicine and have therapy yet, they refuse. </p><p></p><p>How I felt your words on getting a lawyer, clothes, driving such a distance….oh have I been there. They will accept/take any help you give them with no gratitude for doing so! My daughter’s way out of that is, well…. I don’t ask you for money/help but, if you offer I am going to take it. Ouch!</p><p></p><p>Thankfully my daughter cannot write me as she needs money in her commissary to buy a postcard. Last time she was in and we had received this postcard was an inmate who was released and gave her one. Husband and I decided if we get another it’s going right into the shredder, will not even read it. I am going to do as you said and not write to her. Even though it’s my feeling fear of her coming here after getting out, she might still be determined that she can manipulate me somehow face to face. <img class="smilie smilie--emoji" loading="lazy" alt="🤗" title="Hugging face :hugging:" src="https://cdn.jsdelivr.net/joypixels/assets/6.6/png/unicode/64/1f917.png" data-shortname=":hugging:" /></p></blockquote><p></p>
[QUOTE="ANewLife4Me, post: 765213, member: 32799"] Wow healinginside you have floored me! Thank you so very, very much! 🤗 It’s amazing you are having the very same issue and thoughts about a child in jail, I am so very sorry that we have this in common but am so grateful for your concern. You and I need to keep each other strong! Please reach out to me if you just need to chat more in depth. 😊 Each court hearing puts me on edge and makes me so nervous, will say an extra prayer for you today. I am very happy though to read you are going to focus on yourself and your needs, am SO proud of you! ❤️ You mentioned this was his first time in jail and yet here you are, letting him receive the full impact of his actions. I don’t wish a sentence on my daughter as well but it keeps her longer off the streets and longer of her not coming to my house. We don’t want this of course, worst thing we can imagine, it’s hard to think of anything bad for our children. You asked why does this happen to us? What causes mental issues and what did we do wrong? I know for a fact that we are caring, loving, wonderful parents who while not perfect and made a few mistakes….we gave them heart, body and soul. They and I repeat THEY made these choices, there is nothing we could have done or said to change the outcome. As far as mental issues, certainly have no control over that, it’s a brain issue and I also believe in the genes. My family has a huge history of mental illness. Why we have to suffer so, I will never understand that one, have to believe that He will step in when I can bear no more. You have made the decision to not let him live with you ever again as I have with mine. This is such torture thinking upon what the streets are actually like but, this is another lesson they will have to find for themselves and I must come to peace about that as this time it’s for me, it’s for you….we deserve a life that we gave away YEARS on helping them. We did not fail and possibly their mental has not helped their situation but, they can take medicine and have therapy yet, they refuse. How I felt your words on getting a lawyer, clothes, driving such a distance….oh have I been there. They will accept/take any help you give them with no gratitude for doing so! My daughter’s way out of that is, well…. I don’t ask you for money/help but, if you offer I am going to take it. Ouch! Thankfully my daughter cannot write me as she needs money in her commissary to buy a postcard. Last time she was in and we had received this postcard was an inmate who was released and gave her one. Husband and I decided if we get another it’s going right into the shredder, will not even read it. I am going to do as you said and not write to her. Even though it’s my feeling fear of her coming here after getting out, she might still be determined that she can manipulate me somehow face to face. 🤗 [/QUOTE]
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