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Told our difficult child not to come home for holidays, feeling regreted but we just had to...
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<blockquote data-quote="Snow White" data-source="post: 702792" data-attributes="member: 355"><p>Hi Pacific Ocean. Your daughter sounds a lot like ours. The black & white thinking, rages, misuse of your credit card, etc. are all familiar. Even the sudden claiming of being gay is familiar. Our daughter appears to be a chameleon. She changes her "personality" to match the people she is hanging around with at the time. She has even changed religions several times.</p><p></p><p></p><p></p><p></p><p>Your daughter is displaying the same behaviours that our difficult children do. They rely on us for everything but when things go wrong, they become abusive and in some cases, spread lies and accusations against us and other family members. They are adults and are responsible for their behaviours. </p><p></p><p>I'm sorry that your mother has made negative comments about your parenting commitment. If your daughter goes to live with her grandmother it may work out well for a time or it may fail early. </p><p></p><p>Holidays and special occasions always seem to be emotional times. We view these as times to be shared with family and loved ones. Having to exclude a family member goes against everything we believe. Your options are limited. If you allow your daughter home for the holidays, chances are you will get a repeat of the May visit. Not allowing her to come home will give you peace and safety. Yes, you will be sad - but it is time for you to set some boundaries and take care of yourself. Hopefully, you can surround yourselves with family and friends who can help ease this burden.</p><p></p><p>Stay connected here. It really helps. {Hugs}</p></blockquote><p></p>
[QUOTE="Snow White, post: 702792, member: 355"] Hi Pacific Ocean. Your daughter sounds a lot like ours. The black & white thinking, rages, misuse of your credit card, etc. are all familiar. Even the sudden claiming of being gay is familiar. Our daughter appears to be a chameleon. She changes her "personality" to match the people she is hanging around with at the time. She has even changed religions several times. Your daughter is displaying the same behaviours that our difficult children do. They rely on us for everything but when things go wrong, they become abusive and in some cases, spread lies and accusations against us and other family members. They are adults and are responsible for their behaviours. I'm sorry that your mother has made negative comments about your parenting commitment. If your daughter goes to live with her grandmother it may work out well for a time or it may fail early. Holidays and special occasions always seem to be emotional times. We view these as times to be shared with family and loved ones. Having to exclude a family member goes against everything we believe. Your options are limited. If you allow your daughter home for the holidays, chances are you will get a repeat of the May visit. Not allowing her to come home will give you peace and safety. Yes, you will be sad - but it is time for you to set some boundaries and take care of yourself. Hopefully, you can surround yourselves with family and friends who can help ease this burden. Stay connected here. It really helps. {Hugs} [/QUOTE]
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Told our difficult child not to come home for holidays, feeling regreted but we just had to...
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