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Substance Abuse
Took my difficult child to the police station tonight
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<blockquote data-quote="toughlovin" data-source="post: 376184"><p>I agree you have handled things well. Start thinking about how you will handle it when he turns 18 because at that point he will give you the I am 18 and can do what I want line.</p><p></p><p>I have a different suggestion than Susie about this other woman. I would do what I could to build some kind of relationship with her. You may not like her, you may not approve of what she allows with the various teen she lets bunk at her house. Yet that may be a place your difficult child will go if he decides to leave at some point. You want her to be willing to relate to you as a parent and to be willing to give you information. We were just in this situation. We kicked my son out in June. He went to stay with a friend and his parents. We dropped something off for my son and met the dad. He is nothing like us, and there were things I did not agree with at ALL... but I kept my mouth shut. I was very nice and pleasant and he ended up liking us. So every couple of weeks he would call me and check in!! My son was communicating with us some of the time but not always. I got a lot of information from the dad, and he helped my son out quite a bit with things. My attitude was he is helping my kid (and also enabling him) I want to have a good relationship with him. It gave me a LOT of peace of mind to know my son was at least not on the street and to hear how he was doing and also to be able to call the dad if something came up.</p><p></p><p>So my suggestion is try to connect with this woman mother to mother. Be careful not to judge her (even if you do to yourself). I figure all the adults that can in one way or another support my son the better...even if the other adults don't always act like adults.</p></blockquote><p></p>
[QUOTE="toughlovin, post: 376184"] I agree you have handled things well. Start thinking about how you will handle it when he turns 18 because at that point he will give you the I am 18 and can do what I want line. I have a different suggestion than Susie about this other woman. I would do what I could to build some kind of relationship with her. You may not like her, you may not approve of what she allows with the various teen she lets bunk at her house. Yet that may be a place your difficult child will go if he decides to leave at some point. You want her to be willing to relate to you as a parent and to be willing to give you information. We were just in this situation. We kicked my son out in June. He went to stay with a friend and his parents. We dropped something off for my son and met the dad. He is nothing like us, and there were things I did not agree with at ALL... but I kept my mouth shut. I was very nice and pleasant and he ended up liking us. So every couple of weeks he would call me and check in!! My son was communicating with us some of the time but not always. I got a lot of information from the dad, and he helped my son out quite a bit with things. My attitude was he is helping my kid (and also enabling him) I want to have a good relationship with him. It gave me a LOT of peace of mind to know my son was at least not on the street and to hear how he was doing and also to be able to call the dad if something came up. So my suggestion is try to connect with this woman mother to mother. Be careful not to judge her (even if you do to yourself). I figure all the adults that can in one way or another support my son the better...even if the other adults don't always act like adults. [/QUOTE]
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Took my difficult child to the police station tonight
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