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<blockquote data-quote="totoro" data-source="post: 234731" data-attributes="member: 3155"><p>Hey is your daughter named K? </p><p>Seriously. I have had to learn and to not let my expectations get in the way. This is a huge one for husband. He has all of these expectations for K. </p><p>She was going to Piano, then horses, (not her therapy horses which we couldn't get into) We had to stop both due to anxiety and too much in her head. </p><p>It would end up being complete he11 trying to get her to go. husband would get so frustrated. Trying to figure out if we should push her and make her go? </p><p>We did a few times. </p><p>Then it was apparent that it is too much some times.</p><p></p><p>I know for us with K, by the time she is done with School, trying to do things after school, she just can't most days. </p><p>If she does, by dinner time we are in for a breakdown, full hypo night. she goes into a headspin.</p><p>Then the next morning she is delusional. Sometimes seeing things. </p><p>Today, I was going to take her and N for a walk. So I was sitting her drinking coffee, waiting for it to warm up, it is 10am. So I have been prepping her. Told her a couple of times so she would be prepared. I even made it fun, going where she could go look for birds and rocks and crystals. </p><p>We could bring a snack.</p><p>But because yesterday was the 100th day of school it was a big overload day.</p><p>She woke pretty hypo this am. She hasn't stopped moving since she got up, which is why I thought a stinking walk would be good!</p><p></p><p>So as I was reading your post. LOL really LOL</p><p>She walks up to me and says, "Mommy I can't go on a walk, I just don't want to today, I hope you understand?" </p><p>How sweet! But I can hear that anxious fluttery breathing in her when they are anxious. I can see it in her dilated eyes. </p><p>I know I can't push her or she will lose it. </p><p>So we are stuck here...</p><p>So, I have to drop classes, I have to give up doing things at times. Because she just can't. </p><p>I push her when I can. Because I know if I don't it will cause her to become more anxious. Not want to leave the house even more.</p><p>If it means doing *more fun* things just to get her out at times so be it. </p><p>I guess we just have to do what works some times. </p><p>I don't know if this will work for your difficult child, but it helps K. For K right now, I just can't push her to take a bunch of long term classes. Or I have to just face that we might have to drop them and tell the teacher that before we sign up for them.</p><p>Sorry things are hard for you and her.</p></blockquote><p></p>
[QUOTE="totoro, post: 234731, member: 3155"] Hey is your daughter named K? Seriously. I have had to learn and to not let my expectations get in the way. This is a huge one for husband. He has all of these expectations for K. She was going to Piano, then horses, (not her therapy horses which we couldn't get into) We had to stop both due to anxiety and too much in her head. It would end up being complete he11 trying to get her to go. husband would get so frustrated. Trying to figure out if we should push her and make her go? We did a few times. Then it was apparent that it is too much some times. I know for us with K, by the time she is done with School, trying to do things after school, she just can't most days. If she does, by dinner time we are in for a breakdown, full hypo night. she goes into a headspin. Then the next morning she is delusional. Sometimes seeing things. Today, I was going to take her and N for a walk. So I was sitting her drinking coffee, waiting for it to warm up, it is 10am. So I have been prepping her. Told her a couple of times so she would be prepared. I even made it fun, going where she could go look for birds and rocks and crystals. We could bring a snack. But because yesterday was the 100th day of school it was a big overload day. She woke pretty hypo this am. She hasn't stopped moving since she got up, which is why I thought a stinking walk would be good! So as I was reading your post. LOL really LOL She walks up to me and says, "Mommy I can't go on a walk, I just don't want to today, I hope you understand?" How sweet! But I can hear that anxious fluttery breathing in her when they are anxious. I can see it in her dilated eyes. I know I can't push her or she will lose it. So we are stuck here... So, I have to drop classes, I have to give up doing things at times. Because she just can't. I push her when I can. Because I know if I don't it will cause her to become more anxious. Not want to leave the house even more. If it means doing *more fun* things just to get her out at times so be it. I guess we just have to do what works some times. I don't know if this will work for your difficult child, but it helps K. For K right now, I just can't push her to take a bunch of long term classes. Or I have to just face that we might have to drop them and tell the teacher that before we sign up for them. Sorry things are hard for you and her. [/QUOTE]
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