I hate to be a negative nellie but until our difficult children are finally willing to accept rules I am afraid that they will have problems with lasting sobriety. My Difficult Child was (is?) the same way. Rules were stupid and she always was scheming to get around them. The problem is that staying sober is also a rule so that doesn't seem important either.
I remember being told at the parent's meeting at my Difficult Child's rehab that until they are willing to totally surrender to the program and accept that they will follow all of the rules willingly that they will never achieve lasting sobriety. It certainly was true in my daughter's case. She says she has been sober now for 8 months and I hope it is true but I have distanced myself from her so I don't know if she has changed in her attitude towards following the rules. I was encouraged to hear from the last therapist that the staff was encouraged by how dedicated my Difficult Child was towards sobriety.
I hope I am wrong in your son's case but I do see his attitude about breaking the rules as a red flag.
~Kathy
