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<blockquote data-quote="RN0441" data-source="post: 718256" data-attributes="member: 15032"><p>Nessie</p><p></p><p>Welcome and so sorry to hear about your situation.</p><p></p><p>You are not alone. Many of our addicted young adults threaten suicide and act crazy when they are under the influence of drugs or even if they use drugs and are sober they are not themselves.</p><p></p><p>I would call the police each and every time that he threatens suicide.</p><p></p><p>We have been down a dark road for six years since my son was 15. We are in the US and are fortunate to have things that we can control such as detox, rehab etc. We have been trying to help our son for many years. Finally last year in April we sent him to Florida for intensive outpatient care and sober living. He had been in rehab many times in Illinois and seemed to only be able to stay clean for three months or so and then right back at it once he returned home. It was tearing us apart. Thankfully he is our youngest because if I had younger daughters like you, I think we would have moved much quicker.</p><p></p><p>When I found this site I was able to realize that having him in our home and trying to "help" him was making him worse and ruining our life also. By reading the stories here and seeking a therapist for myself I was able to create healthy but loving boundaries for him. This helped me tremendously and it is also good for him. He is 22 and an adult and has to figure this out for himself. I will not enable.</p><p></p><p>If he wants to drug he is not doing it in my home or with me in his life. I don't want to be around it. I don't want to ever see him high again. I will not tolerate this behavior and I am very much done with it. He really is a very special person and we love him with all our hearts but we are not going to love him to death.</p><p></p><p>You really do need to take your focus off your son and focus on yourself and your husband and younger children. If you keep rescuing him he will never grow up. </p><p></p><p>You have to work on yourself and how you are going to cope with the things he is doing right now. It is hard work but it does work and it is worth it to keep yourself sane. Nothing changes if nothing changes. You have to change. When he sees a change in you, maybe he will see that he needs to change also. Sometimes jail is what they need and I'd rather see my own son in jail than drugging to be perfectly honest.</p><p></p><p>We are here for you.</p><p><img src="/community/styles/default/xenforo/smilies/emoticons/pet.gif" class="smilie" loading="lazy" alt=":pet:" title="pet :pet:" data-shortname=":pet:" /></p></blockquote><p></p>
[QUOTE="RN0441, post: 718256, member: 15032"] Nessie Welcome and so sorry to hear about your situation. You are not alone. Many of our addicted young adults threaten suicide and act crazy when they are under the influence of drugs or even if they use drugs and are sober they are not themselves. I would call the police each and every time that he threatens suicide. We have been down a dark road for six years since my son was 15. We are in the US and are fortunate to have things that we can control such as detox, rehab etc. We have been trying to help our son for many years. Finally last year in April we sent him to Florida for intensive outpatient care and sober living. He had been in rehab many times in Illinois and seemed to only be able to stay clean for three months or so and then right back at it once he returned home. It was tearing us apart. Thankfully he is our youngest because if I had younger daughters like you, I think we would have moved much quicker. When I found this site I was able to realize that having him in our home and trying to "help" him was making him worse and ruining our life also. By reading the stories here and seeking a therapist for myself I was able to create healthy but loving boundaries for him. This helped me tremendously and it is also good for him. He is 22 and an adult and has to figure this out for himself. I will not enable. If he wants to drug he is not doing it in my home or with me in his life. I don't want to be around it. I don't want to ever see him high again. I will not tolerate this behavior and I am very much done with it. He really is a very special person and we love him with all our hearts but we are not going to love him to death. You really do need to take your focus off your son and focus on yourself and your husband and younger children. If you keep rescuing him he will never grow up. You have to work on yourself and how you are going to cope with the things he is doing right now. It is hard work but it does work and it is worth it to keep yourself sane. Nothing changes if nothing changes. You have to change. When he sees a change in you, maybe he will see that he needs to change also. Sometimes jail is what they need and I'd rather see my own son in jail than drugging to be perfectly honest. We are here for you. :pet: [/QUOTE]
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