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Twisted - Just twisted.....
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<blockquote data-quote="Nomad" data-source="post: 353403"><p>I am so sorry. </p><p>I would pack up what you deem to be very important items and send them via UPS to Dude. </p><p>The rest, I would find a neutral third party and see if you can make arrangements to take these items to their home and leave them there. Tell Dude he has x number of days to get them or they will go to charity. Perhaps one week, ten days...whatever you and the third party work out. The next day, if they are not picked up, you pick them up and deliver it to charity or make arrangements for the charity to pick them up. Don't worry about it. Don't sweat it. Don't think about. Just do it. Done!</p><p>If you want, ask him if he wants you to pack the computer and send it or leave it with the friend. If you send it and it breaks...too bad, so sad. Do NOT buy him a new one. If you leave it with- a friend and he doesn't pick it up...well too bad, so sad...it goes to charity.</p><p>Then, I would limit phone conversations with him. No conversations at work or in the car, for example. Only speak with him when it is convenient for you to do so.</p><p>Again, I am so sorry.</p><p>As a side note, I just re-read part of the book Setting Boundaries With Your Adult Children. It was powerful.</p><p>As best as you can, shake your emotions out of this. His behavior(s) are completely and totally out of line. You completely and totally need relief. In the end, there is a chance if he feel repercussions for his inappropriate actions cause and effect will sink in. One can only hope. There is no guilt. It is what it is. What choice do you have? I do hope you send him his things with-o it costing you an excessive amount of money. Hold your head up high....let this pain go..give it to your Higher Power. Let HIM deal with it. Let HIM deal with Dude. Move forward my friend.</p></blockquote><p></p>
[QUOTE="Nomad, post: 353403"] I am so sorry. I would pack up what you deem to be very important items and send them via UPS to Dude. The rest, I would find a neutral third party and see if you can make arrangements to take these items to their home and leave them there. Tell Dude he has x number of days to get them or they will go to charity. Perhaps one week, ten days...whatever you and the third party work out. The next day, if they are not picked up, you pick them up and deliver it to charity or make arrangements for the charity to pick them up. Don't worry about it. Don't sweat it. Don't think about. Just do it. Done! If you want, ask him if he wants you to pack the computer and send it or leave it with the friend. If you send it and it breaks...too bad, so sad. Do NOT buy him a new one. If you leave it with- a friend and he doesn't pick it up...well too bad, so sad...it goes to charity. Then, I would limit phone conversations with him. No conversations at work or in the car, for example. Only speak with him when it is convenient for you to do so. Again, I am so sorry. As a side note, I just re-read part of the book Setting Boundaries With Your Adult Children. It was powerful. As best as you can, shake your emotions out of this. His behavior(s) are completely and totally out of line. You completely and totally need relief. In the end, there is a chance if he feel repercussions for his inappropriate actions cause and effect will sink in. One can only hope. There is no guilt. It is what it is. What choice do you have? I do hope you send him his things with-o it costing you an excessive amount of money. Hold your head up high....let this pain go..give it to your Higher Power. Let HIM deal with it. Let HIM deal with Dude. Move forward my friend. [/QUOTE]
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