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Twisted - Just twisted.....
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<blockquote data-quote="Nomad" data-source="post: 353542"><p>I am interested in what Donna said...for you and for myself. </p><p>There are no right or wrong answers with such things, I believe. </p><p>I do think our kids need to feel logical consequences, we need to avoid getting our emotions tide up in their behaviors and I think we should avoid hurting ourselves. And spending money you don't have for difficult children mistakes...hmmmm. something to think about.</p><p>In an earlier post you said you were thinking of sending his stuff including his Easter Basket. That hit me hard. </p><p>I have a small Easter gift for my difficult child. The other day I mentioned it to her. This is after we have set up some firm boundaries and she is noticing them.</p><p>Anyway, ya know what? After I mentioned the Easter Basket she SMIRKED. Not a nice smile...but a weird smirk. </p><p>It bothered me A LOT! </p><p>Sort of like "see, no matter how inappropriate my behavior, you will still love me and do nice things for me." Ewwww. </p><p>I wish my other was still alive...someone who loved me unconditionally. It is a treasure...never something to be taken advantage of and abused.</p><p>Well, it is a hard and confusing lesson. One that is hard for me to even comprehend.</p><p>Some folks just don't know what they have until it is lost and then we can only hope and pray that even then they figure it all out.</p></blockquote><p></p>
[QUOTE="Nomad, post: 353542"] I am interested in what Donna said...for you and for myself. There are no right or wrong answers with such things, I believe. I do think our kids need to feel logical consequences, we need to avoid getting our emotions tide up in their behaviors and I think we should avoid hurting ourselves. And spending money you don't have for difficult children mistakes...hmmmm. something to think about. In an earlier post you said you were thinking of sending his stuff including his Easter Basket. That hit me hard. I have a small Easter gift for my difficult child. The other day I mentioned it to her. This is after we have set up some firm boundaries and she is noticing them. Anyway, ya know what? After I mentioned the Easter Basket she SMIRKED. Not a nice smile...but a weird smirk. It bothered me A LOT! Sort of like "see, no matter how inappropriate my behavior, you will still love me and do nice things for me." Ewwww. I wish my other was still alive...someone who loved me unconditionally. It is a treasure...never something to be taken advantage of and abused. Well, it is a hard and confusing lesson. One that is hard for me to even comprehend. Some folks just don't know what they have until it is lost and then we can only hope and pray that even then they figure it all out. [/QUOTE]
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