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Twisted - Just twisted.....
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<blockquote data-quote="Star*" data-source="post: 353735" data-attributes="member: 4964"><p>Dear Family, </p><p></p><p>Thank you so much for the words of wisdom. It seems when your heart hurts? It tends to cloud your perceptions of what is "if you love me you'll do this, and what is drawing the line in your own sand for personal boundaries." I'm doing better thanks. </p><p></p><p>Not sure what I'm going to do. I did not answer a phone call from him for the first time in my life. Yup. Sat and cried for 30 minutes too. Bugger. Wish this would just happen without me feeling like I had to get angry or so indifferent about the situation. It should just be like - OH, there's a call from Dude, I don't want to talk right now so I won't. Not, OHhhhhhhhhh there's another call from DUde.....when he calls it makes my guts tie up in knots and gives me hours of things to be upset about - he's a jerk, he's selfish, he's mean, he only ever wants something from me, I'll be up all night or grinding my teeth to the bone and crying if I take that call...then for hours after - thinking - I wonder what he wanted.....is he okay? I wonder if he needed some sound advice....no he's only calling to get something....he only calls when he needs something - you know that. DUmmy...." </p><p></p><p>I mean my brain is like SHUT UP BRAIN. I swear if I started drinking wine now? I'd have to bring a flask to work.</p></blockquote><p></p>
[QUOTE="Star*, post: 353735, member: 4964"] Dear Family, Thank you so much for the words of wisdom. It seems when your heart hurts? It tends to cloud your perceptions of what is "if you love me you'll do this, and what is drawing the line in your own sand for personal boundaries." I'm doing better thanks. Not sure what I'm going to do. I did not answer a phone call from him for the first time in my life. Yup. Sat and cried for 30 minutes too. Bugger. Wish this would just happen without me feeling like I had to get angry or so indifferent about the situation. It should just be like - OH, there's a call from Dude, I don't want to talk right now so I won't. Not, OHhhhhhhhhh there's another call from DUde.....when he calls it makes my guts tie up in knots and gives me hours of things to be upset about - he's a jerk, he's selfish, he's mean, he only ever wants something from me, I'll be up all night or grinding my teeth to the bone and crying if I take that call...then for hours after - thinking - I wonder what he wanted.....is he okay? I wonder if he needed some sound advice....no he's only calling to get something....he only calls when he needs something - you know that. DUmmy...." I mean my brain is like SHUT UP BRAIN. I swear if I started drinking wine now? I'd have to bring a flask to work. [/QUOTE]
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