UHG! I need a place to vent - in-laws & difficult child

[Mom2oddson]

For those of you who don't remember, here is a quick history. A long time ago, husband had a drug problem. In-laws took custody of his kids. Forced husband to get clean. 12 years now! When husband and I got together we got the kids, but not custody. There was always an excuse.

Last summer, in-laws pulled the custody card and took difficult child away from us. And have let difficult child have a year free of any consequences. Now, father in law has decided that difficult child is cramping his style and that I now have to take difficult child back. They are even giving husband custody.

The thing is, husband is in San Diego until October and I'll be here alone with difficult child. Who is physically threatening when husband is out of town.

I don't know what to do with difficult child during the summer. I don't trust him with the other children or the animals. So he can't stay at my house with me not being there. My parents will keep him until husband gets back. difficult child is afraid of my Dad. Think The Godfather when you think about my Dad. So, difficult child could stay there during the week days and with me on the weekend. I should be able to handle this, but I can't.

I'm still dealing with the shock from easy child on Monday. (Oh, she's adjusting nicely to the risperdal). I'm trying to help out my other easy child with bully issues. Some very tough bullies. Then there is the depression from husband being gone. It's only been six days. Only 185 days left until he comes home.

I'm still very mad at difficult child who started all this garbage. I'm not catering to him. I'm not letting him have a cell phone. He's not visiting and hanging with friends all summer. My easy child's have to have C's or better to be with their friends this summer. difficult child has all F's. (On purpose).... Why should I let him have different rules than the other kids??

I don't even know if husband and I can survive all of this. Everything has to be done through a cell phone. And when husband told me that I need to get difficult child in July so that the in-laws can enjoy their vacation... I went off on husband. I said a lot of things that only hurt husband.... When I really want to do is verbally shred my in-laws.

UHG! :grrr:

 

[Sunlight]

your inlaws have taken difficult child along long time. he is probably getting harder for them and they want to enjoy their life too. your husband should be responsible for his son. not you. can he be sent to live with husband??

 

[tracy551]

Are there ant summer camps in your area or is he old enough to get a summer job to keep him busy for a while?

 

[Mom2oddson]

husband is on a military base - if difficult child does anything wrong - husband WILL lose his job.

No camps - and difficult child would have to be willing to listen and follow an authority figure in order to hold down a job.

I'm willing to take difficult child back, but I want to wait until August 8th. father in law is demanding July 13th! And threatening to divorce mother in law if is doesn't happen. And husband is caving on cuz his mommy is crying.

AND - they might not have the custody papers ready before then! UHG!!!

 

[JJJ]

Refuse to take him until the custody papers are done. If you can't find a camp to take difficult child, could you send both PCs to a summer camp for the weeks he will be there? At least you won't have to worry about their safety and they can enjoy themselves.