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Unbelievable Stupid Meddlers
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<blockquote data-quote="WSM" data-source="post: 240267" data-attributes="member: 5169"><p>difficult child didn't used to be good at it either. But he's getting better. The first time he accused us of abuse, he said he had a bump on his head because his dad hit him (the lunch lady patted his head and he screamed OUCH!).</p><p> </p><p>CPS was called, and they couldn't find a bump. He changed his story and said no one hit him. Then a month later on a follow up visit, he said I hit him. Case closed.</p><p> </p><p>Another time he asked his dad if they could talk. husband took him on a two hour car ride. For two hours difficult child accused me of everything from beating him, to sticking pins in him, to poisoning him, to stealing his clothes, homework, bike and toys, to calling him names. husband got an emergency session with a counselor. The counsellor was horrified by what husband told her on the phone, she believed it, husband half believed it, and when difficult child got into her office, he didn't want to talk about any of that. He wanted to talk about how mean his dad was for not letting him go to Orlando for a weekend with a family of a classmate he'd just met and we never had. difficult child had told the classmate's mother how meeeeeean Dad was and she felt sorry for him (altho months later she forbade her son to even talk with difficult child because he was 'sick in the head') and invited difficult child. The counselor wanted to talk about the abuse allegations; difficult child wasn't interested, he wanted to persuade the counselor to make take give permission for him to go to Disney. After a few more sessions, mostly with husband and I, this is the counsellor who thought he should go to a therapeutic residential school.</p><p> </p><p>Another time, Dec 5, 2007, difficult child met another kid one street over from us. This boy went to a different school, so they didn't know each other. difficult child told this kid's mother he was abused at home and afraid to go home (actually he had missed his curfew and was going to be late for dinner). The mother got indignant and took difficult child to her mother's house and got her husband and came over to our house. She demanded to speak to husband without me and then told husband how abusive I was to poor difficult child. husband explained difficult child's history and problems and said to take difficult child to the police station if they had any doubts about difficult child's safety. Upon reflection the couple decided they'd just bring difficult child back. They went home to get him, difficult child re-convinced him of the torture awaiting him when he got home. They put him in a car and parked in front of the neighbor's house and refused to return him since husband had taken another of the kids to boy scouts. I called husband and the police. The police came, explained to them that the penalty for unlawful detention of a minor under 13 was punishable by 5 years in prison and got him out of the car. The police then talked to difficult child. difficult child told them his complaint wasn't that he was hit or abused but that he didn't get to play video games. Weird thing was, at the time difficult child was not restricted from video games and had actually played them that morning before school. But it was another case closed. </p><p> </p><p>Another time he said he didn't have his homework because he saw me throw it away. He was out back cleaning the pool and saw me go into the dining room, take his homework, carry it through the kitchen and to my desk and hide it. He was passionate about it. He saw it! He saw it!</p><p> </p><p>The problem is there is no place by the pool or anywhere in the backyard where you can see the dining room--unless you can also see through the breakfast room wall. And unless I was carrying it over my head, you couldn't see me from the kitchen window either; the kitchen window is high over the sink. difficult child acknowledged he couldn't see through walls, but that just the same he DID see me take his homework out of the dining room and hide it. He did, he did, he swears he did!! He cried and looked so pathetic that I was willing to believe him myself. difficult child would not concede he lied, until several months later when he said he must have dreamed it.</p><p> </p><p>This one happened this Xmas Eve. difficult child had taken to smuggling syrup upstairs and dumping it on his mattress and floor (no one knows why). His mattress had been out back for a while after having been scrubbed off and drying. On Xmas Eve, me and the other kids all left the house to pick up family from the airport, leaving husband and difficult child alone home. As a Xmas gift husband took the mattress back upstairs (he'd threatened if you do this again, you are going to lose your mattress for good, but it was Xmas...). He noticed the room was messy and said difficult child had five minutes to straighten it up. He then went downstairs to the patio (we live in So. Florida, so it was warm). A couple minutes later, difficult child strolls downstairs saying, "I'm so pizzed; somebody spilled syrup all over my room and mattress again!" Like he really thought he wasn't going to be blamed. There was no one in the house.</p><p> </p><p>So he's got the concept of lying down, he's certainly got the passion and the act down, he just messes up on follow through and details. But not everyone takes the time to check on details and think the lies through. Many people just take it all on faith because of the story and his apparent sincerity. </p><p> </p><p>And there's such a quantity of these stories that a lot of people think, 'where there's smoke, there's fire.'</p><p> </p><p>And I worry about the day he gets all the parts of it right.</p></blockquote><p></p>
[QUOTE="WSM, post: 240267, member: 5169"] difficult child didn't used to be good at it either. But he's getting better. The first time he accused us of abuse, he said he had a bump on his head because his dad hit him (the lunch lady patted his head and he screamed OUCH!). CPS was called, and they couldn't find a bump. He changed his story and said no one hit him. Then a month later on a follow up visit, he said I hit him. Case closed. Another time he asked his dad if they could talk. husband took him on a two hour car ride. For two hours difficult child accused me of everything from beating him, to sticking pins in him, to poisoning him, to stealing his clothes, homework, bike and toys, to calling him names. husband got an emergency session with a counselor. The counsellor was horrified by what husband told her on the phone, she believed it, husband half believed it, and when difficult child got into her office, he didn't want to talk about any of that. He wanted to talk about how mean his dad was for not letting him go to Orlando for a weekend with a family of a classmate he'd just met and we never had. difficult child had told the classmate's mother how meeeeeean Dad was and she felt sorry for him (altho months later she forbade her son to even talk with difficult child because he was 'sick in the head') and invited difficult child. The counselor wanted to talk about the abuse allegations; difficult child wasn't interested, he wanted to persuade the counselor to make take give permission for him to go to Disney. After a few more sessions, mostly with husband and I, this is the counsellor who thought he should go to a therapeutic residential school. Another time, Dec 5, 2007, difficult child met another kid one street over from us. This boy went to a different school, so they didn't know each other. difficult child told this kid's mother he was abused at home and afraid to go home (actually he had missed his curfew and was going to be late for dinner). The mother got indignant and took difficult child to her mother's house and got her husband and came over to our house. She demanded to speak to husband without me and then told husband how abusive I was to poor difficult child. husband explained difficult child's history and problems and said to take difficult child to the police station if they had any doubts about difficult child's safety. Upon reflection the couple decided they'd just bring difficult child back. They went home to get him, difficult child re-convinced him of the torture awaiting him when he got home. They put him in a car and parked in front of the neighbor's house and refused to return him since husband had taken another of the kids to boy scouts. I called husband and the police. The police came, explained to them that the penalty for unlawful detention of a minor under 13 was punishable by 5 years in prison and got him out of the car. The police then talked to difficult child. difficult child told them his complaint wasn't that he was hit or abused but that he didn't get to play video games. Weird thing was, at the time difficult child was not restricted from video games and had actually played them that morning before school. But it was another case closed. Another time he said he didn't have his homework because he saw me throw it away. He was out back cleaning the pool and saw me go into the dining room, take his homework, carry it through the kitchen and to my desk and hide it. He was passionate about it. He saw it! He saw it! The problem is there is no place by the pool or anywhere in the backyard where you can see the dining room--unless you can also see through the breakfast room wall. And unless I was carrying it over my head, you couldn't see me from the kitchen window either; the kitchen window is high over the sink. difficult child acknowledged he couldn't see through walls, but that just the same he DID see me take his homework out of the dining room and hide it. He did, he did, he swears he did!! He cried and looked so pathetic that I was willing to believe him myself. difficult child would not concede he lied, until several months later when he said he must have dreamed it. This one happened this Xmas Eve. difficult child had taken to smuggling syrup upstairs and dumping it on his mattress and floor (no one knows why). His mattress had been out back for a while after having been scrubbed off and drying. On Xmas Eve, me and the other kids all left the house to pick up family from the airport, leaving husband and difficult child alone home. As a Xmas gift husband took the mattress back upstairs (he'd threatened if you do this again, you are going to lose your mattress for good, but it was Xmas...). He noticed the room was messy and said difficult child had five minutes to straighten it up. He then went downstairs to the patio (we live in So. Florida, so it was warm). A couple minutes later, difficult child strolls downstairs saying, "I'm so pizzed; somebody spilled syrup all over my room and mattress again!" Like he really thought he wasn't going to be blamed. There was no one in the house. So he's got the concept of lying down, he's certainly got the passion and the act down, he just messes up on follow through and details. But not everyone takes the time to check on details and think the lies through. Many people just take it all on faith because of the story and his apparent sincerity. And there's such a quantity of these stories that a lot of people think, 'where there's smoke, there's fire.' And I worry about the day he gets all the parts of it right. [/QUOTE]
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