"unexpected result" UPDATE

saving grace

New Member
I got an email today from the coordinator at the program that D has been in since March, he asked if we could come in because one of D's recent urine test came back with an "unexpected result" Now I know about a month ago or 3 weeks when D was on his way to a test he told me he had taken a xanax a few days before, he has been having alot of anxiety. I was mad at him but glad he told me. we have been trying for over 3 weeks to get a 4th medication approved by the insurance company that the doctor thought would help with the anxiety. It was finally just approved. I know its no excuse but thats the only relapse I knew about. I asked him today if he had done anything else and he said "no", I think he is lying, I just have a feeling.
He takes Suboxone, Depakote, Seroquel and now Effexor.

I need some fingers crossed that I wont be surprised with the "unexpected result" tomorrow. He hasnt been the best lately but he has been better.

Grace
 

DDD

Well-Known Member
I will cross my body parts and say a prayer, Grace. The results
could be alot of things. I'm hoping it is not a major issue getting ready to rear it's ugly head. Hang in there. DDD
 

saving grace

New Member
We just got back a few hours ago. I have been so upset, He tested positive for Ocycontin!! I asked him about 5 times to be straight with me so that I was not got off gaurd in the office. He said he was scared, I say thats bull, I told him your 21 years old and you lied because you were not about to admit it until you absolutely were nailed, and you didnt want to accept responsibility.
I couldnt and still dont understand why or how he can take and opiate while taking 16 mgs of Suboxone a day, he said he doesnt know, that it was stupid and he got sick from it. He is lying, I am sure of it.

I cant breathe right now, I am going to lie down.

Thanks for always being here

Grace
 

everywoman

Well-Known Member
I'm so sorry. My husband was addicted to oxycontin for 6 years. It was horrible. I hope that the program will keep your son and recognize that he needs additonal support to stay clean. My prayers are with you.
 

saving grace

New Member
Thanks for the open arms. Yes the program will keep him, this is the first relapse since he started in March. They offer group counseling, they give them a few chances, recognizing that relapse is part of recovery and they encourage rather than discourage, I like that about the program. He was tested again today to see if there is a pattern, he said he only used the once so we will see. I just cant wrap my head around this right now, I dont want to think about it.
I am sure alot of you know what I mean when I say that it hurts more this time than it has in the past, I had my hopes up and dropped my gaurd just a little. I felt like I got punched in the stomach. In the past I expected it, this time I was really really disappointed.

Grace
 

KFld

New Member
Grace, you know my son relapsed last summer, while on suboxone. He wasn't ready to appreciate the chance he was given and had moved out of his soberhouse too quick and wasn't serious enough about his life. He admitted that he would just not take the suboxone on the days he wanted to use and then would take the suboxone when he couldn't get the drug. Don't give up hope. I'm so glad to hear that they will not make him leave the program. So many programs discharge you immediatley, which I believe is totally wrong. Relapse is part of recovery and they need to give them a chance to get back on track.

Last summer seems to have taught my son to appreciate what the suboxone does for him. He has been 8 months clean and talked about trying to come off of it, but he is afraid, so to me that means he's not ready. He learned last summer just how easy it is to fall right back into that dark hole and we were fortuante that he didn't just keep digging himself deeper, but realized right away that he needed to get right back into treatment and back on track. I think his relapse was one of the biggest lessons he learned and it put a totally different perspective on what he needed to do with his life in order to stay clean.

Your son sounds soooo much like mine when it comes to not admitting anything until he is totally backed into the corner and the proof is right there. When I think back to the things my difficult child denied right up until that moment. His not admitting he used until the drug test proved him positive is exactly what my difficult child would have done.

Hopefully your son will continue on the suboxone and learn from this how easy it is to relapse and I hope he learns to take full advantage and realize how lucky he is to be given the chance to take it.

Don't give up hope. Continue to live your life and detatch and pray that he learns to move forward again.

SERENITY PRAYER!!!!!! Come on, let me here you say it :smile: A little bit louder, I can't quite hear you!!!!!
 

Sunlight

Active Member
grace, as you problem know, oxycontin is widely abused. I am sorry D has continued his drug use and continues to deny how much it affects his life.

the thing is you have to work on how it affects you now. his life is his own. he knows what he has to do.

time to read this book again:
codependent no more by melody beattie. go get it at the library!
 

saving grace

New Member
Karen, the program he is in is a family based program, meaning the whole family is involved and we had to sign commitment contracts. It is usually for teens to age 20 he just made it in so I can see how the family concept would work for younger kids but its a bit hard to work the program with him and also expecting him to act like and adult. One of the parts that I agreed to was to hold and dispense his Suboxone, when we go in for an appointment they count the pills I have. He is supposed to take it right in front of me, 8 times out of 10 I watch him put it in his mouth and then check that is is dissolving. Thats what is confusing me, the only thing I can think of his his morning pill that I have to leave for him 3 mornings a week, maybe he isnt taking that one or selling it, but even the doctor said that with the ones that he is taking it will still be in is system and the opiates will make him sick. He takes 8mg in the morning and 8mg at night.
I have to say he is better than he was especially last Summer. I was preparing for his funeral last Summer. I hope this relapse no matter how small will have a big enough impact on him and he will have learned from it.

Janet, I have that book in my work bag, it comes and goes with me everywhere I go.

Grace
 

rejectedmom

New Member
Grace I am sorry you are feeling so low right now. I hope your difficult child makes better use of his second chance in this program. (((HUGS))) to you. -RM
 
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