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<blockquote data-quote="toughlovin" data-source="post: 705096" data-attributes="member: 15801"><p>I do think getting support from other parents with similar issues really helps. I think realizing that they have their own journey and they need to figure it out helps. And even if you dont want to cut off all contact, stopping the conversation when it gets abusive towards you in any way (so calling you names, telling you you are not a good mother etc). So when that starts up saying I am not going to go there and hang up. Dont answer right away when he calls back. You can make a decision that you dont want to hear that stuff.</p><p></p><p>And then it is about finding things in your life that make you happy... that you like to do. Buliding a life for you. </p><p></p><p>This has been a tough holiday in some ways because my son is really struggling and is very depressed... so he did not join us for dinner last night, and he does not even want to open presents today! And yet I still enjoyed dinner with the friends who came over last night (while my son stayed in his rooom). I enjoyed going out and spending time with my daughter even though my son was home. I enjoyed exchanging gifts with my husband when we got home and I will enjoy my evening.</p><p></p><p>Yes I am worried and sad for my son. It kind of breaks my heart to see him hurting so badly.... but I am not letting it take over my being, my day, my well being.</p><p></p><p>Now I will say this has not always been the case... there have been times not he past where it did. But I am no longer willing to let that happen.</p></blockquote><p></p>
[QUOTE="toughlovin, post: 705096, member: 15801"] I do think getting support from other parents with similar issues really helps. I think realizing that they have their own journey and they need to figure it out helps. And even if you dont want to cut off all contact, stopping the conversation when it gets abusive towards you in any way (so calling you names, telling you you are not a good mother etc). So when that starts up saying I am not going to go there and hang up. Dont answer right away when he calls back. You can make a decision that you dont want to hear that stuff. And then it is about finding things in your life that make you happy... that you like to do. Buliding a life for you. This has been a tough holiday in some ways because my son is really struggling and is very depressed... so he did not join us for dinner last night, and he does not even want to open presents today! And yet I still enjoyed dinner with the friends who came over last night (while my son stayed in his rooom). I enjoyed going out and spending time with my daughter even though my son was home. I enjoyed exchanging gifts with my husband when we got home and I will enjoy my evening. Yes I am worried and sad for my son. It kind of breaks my heart to see him hurting so badly.... but I am not letting it take over my being, my day, my well being. Now I will say this has not always been the case... there have been times not he past where it did. But I am no longer willing to let that happen. [/QUOTE]
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