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General Parenting
Update of difficult child and his PO- the short version
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<blockquote data-quote="klmno" data-source="post: 454668" data-attributes="member: 3699"><p>Step, this state uses Department of Juvenile Justice to train new people, intentionally or not. They don't pay much in Department of Juvenile Justice as rehabilitating juvenile offenders is not a priority with taxpayers in this state, even when the economy is good. Therefore, newbies in the correctional fileds (like POs) and attnys can easily get a job with Department of Juvenile Justice and of course, they are green in their field but think they know everything because they recently gradutaed from college. On top of that, this means they are more than likely too young to have kids and most aren't even married yet. They are more worried about getting their career underway than anything and comletely clueless when it comes to being an appropriate authority figure- both what's appropriate for a parent and what's going to get the best results from them as a PO. The PO said he'd asked difficult child what he was in lock (isolation) for and difficult child told him a lighter and said he just wanted it as a token of what he could get from their way of trading things in Department of Juvenile Justice. Not only did PO buy that story, he was completely clueless that this wasn't the only thing difficult child was in isolation for. He was also in there for assaulting a staff person in Department of Juvenile Justice.</p><p></p><p>Last PO told difficult child he'd go back to Department of Juvenile Justice if he messed up at all. Then when difficult child messed up the first 2 times, both times PO went to him at school and talked to him about how "he was trying to do him a favor by letting it slide"- TWICE- and apparently honestly believing this would make difficult child appreciate him and think the PO was great and difficult child would stay out of trouble. In a difficult child's mind, that translates into "the guy isn't going to do anything he says so I'll just soak this for everything I can". Then, when it went on so long that the PO has NO choice but to recommend a recommitment to difficult child, difficult child had done so much he got a long term sentence, then they assigned another newbie PO so there is no "build" on epxerience- they change POs every time I turn around, ...as soon as we are used to get one trained. This PO doesn't know half of what difficult child has done, won't take time to read his file, and doesn't care to listen to anything I have to say. It's the same pat answer no matter what. They are all like that. When I asked why, I get "statistics show a kid who's been in Department of Juvenile Justice does best when sent back home" therefore, they get them back home ASAP. Of course, the lack of funding and liability/responsibility in this state makes that pretty easy.</p><p></p><p>The way I left things with this PO at the last meeting and hearing all that- "I don't want to hear ONE word about witholding info from you in the future- the method you all have to complain about a parent witholding info then going straight to the kid and confronting them with it then sending the kid home to the parent who told it just doesn't work- it's exactly how we got here".</p><p></p><p>I know you have your hands full with O, Step, but a rebellious teen smoking a j is one thing, a boy who's a lot bigger than his mom and only living with his mom and robbing her twice with a knife in his hand is another thing. And I honestly think that csu peoples' way of dealing with things made our relationship horrible and left the door open for these things to happen, and difficult child took it from there.</p></blockquote><p></p>
[QUOTE="klmno, post: 454668, member: 3699"] Step, this state uses Department of Juvenile Justice to train new people, intentionally or not. They don't pay much in Department of Juvenile Justice as rehabilitating juvenile offenders is not a priority with taxpayers in this state, even when the economy is good. Therefore, newbies in the correctional fileds (like POs) and attnys can easily get a job with Department of Juvenile Justice and of course, they are green in their field but think they know everything because they recently gradutaed from college. On top of that, this means they are more than likely too young to have kids and most aren't even married yet. They are more worried about getting their career underway than anything and comletely clueless when it comes to being an appropriate authority figure- both what's appropriate for a parent and what's going to get the best results from them as a PO. The PO said he'd asked difficult child what he was in lock (isolation) for and difficult child told him a lighter and said he just wanted it as a token of what he could get from their way of trading things in Department of Juvenile Justice. Not only did PO buy that story, he was completely clueless that this wasn't the only thing difficult child was in isolation for. He was also in there for assaulting a staff person in Department of Juvenile Justice. Last PO told difficult child he'd go back to Department of Juvenile Justice if he messed up at all. Then when difficult child messed up the first 2 times, both times PO went to him at school and talked to him about how "he was trying to do him a favor by letting it slide"- TWICE- and apparently honestly believing this would make difficult child appreciate him and think the PO was great and difficult child would stay out of trouble. In a difficult child's mind, that translates into "the guy isn't going to do anything he says so I'll just soak this for everything I can". Then, when it went on so long that the PO has NO choice but to recommend a recommitment to difficult child, difficult child had done so much he got a long term sentence, then they assigned another newbie PO so there is no "build" on epxerience- they change POs every time I turn around, ...as soon as we are used to get one trained. This PO doesn't know half of what difficult child has done, won't take time to read his file, and doesn't care to listen to anything I have to say. It's the same pat answer no matter what. They are all like that. When I asked why, I get "statistics show a kid who's been in Department of Juvenile Justice does best when sent back home" therefore, they get them back home ASAP. Of course, the lack of funding and liability/responsibility in this state makes that pretty easy. The way I left things with this PO at the last meeting and hearing all that- "I don't want to hear ONE word about witholding info from you in the future- the method you all have to complain about a parent witholding info then going straight to the kid and confronting them with it then sending the kid home to the parent who told it just doesn't work- it's exactly how we got here". I know you have your hands full with O, Step, but a rebellious teen smoking a j is one thing, a boy who's a lot bigger than his mom and only living with his mom and robbing her twice with a knife in his hand is another thing. And I honestly think that csu peoples' way of dealing with things made our relationship horrible and left the door open for these things to happen, and difficult child took it from there. [/QUOTE]
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