Forums
New posts
Search forums
What's new
New posts
New profile posts
Latest activity
Internet Search
Members
Current visitors
New profile posts
Search profile posts
Log in
Register
What's new
Search
Search
Search titles only
By:
New posts
Search forums
Menu
Log in
Register
Install the app
Install
Forums
Parent Support Forums
General Parenting
Update on SS
JavaScript is disabled. For a better experience, please enable JavaScript in your browser before proceeding.
You are using an out of date browser. It may not display this or other websites correctly.
You should upgrade or use an
alternative browser
.
Reply to thread
Message
<blockquote data-quote="BusynMember" data-source="post: 615118" data-attributes="member: 1550"><p>Don't feel bad. He loves you, but you're an adult. He is worried about his son, who is still a child and going in the wrong direction. He is feeling very desperate, but neither he nor bio. mom are willing to take any steps to get him help. If you contact CPS first before somebody else does (and eventually somebody else will), they will think you honestly want to help him and will be far more cooperative. At least that has been our experience. If you do talk to hubby, ask him if he'd rather that the first steps in finding your son serious help or have the juvenile justice system do it because SS gets into trouble with somebody outside of the family? Then it is out of his hands. </p><p>My feeling is that SS is already too far gone to change, but I am no big time expert and I hope I'm wrong. These are the years he has to try to help his son or else he is giving up on him, although he may believe he is saving him. He's not.</p><p>You are a very important person, equal to your hub and his son. You do not have a child to put first or you may understand more...usually parents do put their kids needs first because they are children and we are adults. However, some parents even put their abusive, disturbed and toxic adult children first...that's when I see it as a real issue. Your husband needs to see his son as he really is...a near teen who better get intensive help very soon or he will lose him in the teen years and possibly forever. I mean...he may live with you two for a while, but he will become unrecognizable and possibly a big legal problem and maybe into drugs...his bio. mom is too weak to get him help. That leaves only his father...or you, if you wish to take that step. </p><p>We are with you all the way whatever you decide to do, but do keep yourself and your puppy safe from him. I'd carry that dog around 24/7 when SS is there and I'd try hard to stay out of his way. As for discipline? I sure wouldn't want to tick him off. I'd let your husband take his wrath, not yourself. He is the one who is unwilling to do anything...so far. One can hope!</p></blockquote><p></p>
[QUOTE="BusynMember, post: 615118, member: 1550"] Don't feel bad. He loves you, but you're an adult. He is worried about his son, who is still a child and going in the wrong direction. He is feeling very desperate, but neither he nor bio. mom are willing to take any steps to get him help. If you contact CPS first before somebody else does (and eventually somebody else will), they will think you honestly want to help him and will be far more cooperative. At least that has been our experience. If you do talk to hubby, ask him if he'd rather that the first steps in finding your son serious help or have the juvenile justice system do it because SS gets into trouble with somebody outside of the family? Then it is out of his hands. My feeling is that SS is already too far gone to change, but I am no big time expert and I hope I'm wrong. These are the years he has to try to help his son or else he is giving up on him, although he may believe he is saving him. He's not. You are a very important person, equal to your hub and his son. You do not have a child to put first or you may understand more...usually parents do put their kids needs first because they are children and we are adults. However, some parents even put their abusive, disturbed and toxic adult children first...that's when I see it as a real issue. Your husband needs to see his son as he really is...a near teen who better get intensive help very soon or he will lose him in the teen years and possibly forever. I mean...he may live with you two for a while, but he will become unrecognizable and possibly a big legal problem and maybe into drugs...his bio. mom is too weak to get him help. That leaves only his father...or you, if you wish to take that step. We are with you all the way whatever you decide to do, but do keep yourself and your puppy safe from him. I'd carry that dog around 24/7 when SS is there and I'd try hard to stay out of his way. As for discipline? I sure wouldn't want to tick him off. I'd let your husband take his wrath, not yourself. He is the one who is unwilling to do anything...so far. One can hope! [/QUOTE]
Insert quotes…
Verification
Post reply
Forums
Parent Support Forums
General Parenting
Update on SS
Top