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<blockquote data-quote="meowbunny" data-source="post: 119496" data-attributes="member: 3626"><p>As you said, it is now out of your control. He may not eat healthily, but he'll eat and the junk food won't kill him. The odds of him making a good choice of friends is highly unlikely -- he's going to drift to like. He may get tired of the partying, unhealthy eating, etc. but it will be at his speed. There truly is nothing you can do and worrying about his choices is an act of futility. I know, I've been there.</p><p> </p><p>You're his mother. You'll always worry and fret. It goes with the territory. The trick is to control the worrying to very generic things -- hoping he is okay and doing well, not he's eating unhealthy food and hanging out with X and Y, who are really bad news. When he calls, be happy for any semi-good news he gives you. Practice phrases such as, "I'm sorry to hear that," "that's too bad," etc. for the things you don't want to hear. I found that practicing my phrases for 10 minutes a day made it much easier to respond the few times she would call when she was out on her own.</p><p> </p><p>For now, take this time to re-energize, get your life back. Start doing for you. Renovate his room into a special room for you. Fix the foods you like, play the music you want to hear. All the things you couldn't do with an older teen in the house.</p><p> </p><p>Believe it or not, it does get somewhat easier as time distances things.</p></blockquote><p></p>
[QUOTE="meowbunny, post: 119496, member: 3626"] As you said, it is now out of your control. He may not eat healthily, but he'll eat and the junk food won't kill him. The odds of him making a good choice of friends is highly unlikely -- he's going to drift to like. He may get tired of the partying, unhealthy eating, etc. but it will be at his speed. There truly is nothing you can do and worrying about his choices is an act of futility. I know, I've been there. You're his mother. You'll always worry and fret. It goes with the territory. The trick is to control the worrying to very generic things -- hoping he is okay and doing well, not he's eating unhealthy food and hanging out with X and Y, who are really bad news. When he calls, be happy for any semi-good news he gives you. Practice phrases such as, "I'm sorry to hear that," "that's too bad," etc. for the things you don't want to hear. I found that practicing my phrases for 10 minutes a day made it much easier to respond the few times she would call when she was out on her own. For now, take this time to re-energize, get your life back. Start doing for you. Renovate his room into a special room for you. Fix the foods you like, play the music you want to hear. All the things you couldn't do with an older teen in the house. Believe it or not, it does get somewhat easier as time distances things. [/QUOTE]
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