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<blockquote data-quote="toughlovin" data-source="post: 565965"><p>Ag I am totally with you on all of it. It is true that the likelihood of him getting in recovery is lower with his attitude and it seemingly being you doing more of the work than he is. But there are cases where people go into treatment unwillingly and do find recovery and the want while there. That did not happen withy my difficult child and we have spent way more than 10K on treatment for him over the years and in the last year. </p><p></p><p>However I dont really regret the money we have spent for two reasons. Especially when he was younger it did give him some drug free time for his brain to continue to develop without drugs in his system. I think that probably will make a difference in the long run at least I hope so. And the last year of treatment after treatment, with my working much harder than he was to get him into treatment etc. did help me get to the place I am now. I think that is why your sponser said this is for you. I have gained some peace knowing that I did everything I could possibly do to help him. If he had died along the way and I had not done everything then I would be full of regrets. At this point if something happens to him (hopefully not) then at least I know within my own heart that i did everything. I think that is key to finding peace in the chaos that is our difficult children lives.</p><p></p><p>And it helped me let go so that I can let my difficult child now really try to find his own way hitchhiking around the country homeless with no money etc. Now all I want is for him to stay in touch with me so that I know he is alive and surviving.</p><p></p><p>So I say go for it, spend the money on his treatment and time will tell whether he made use of it or not.</p><p></p><p>I am also with you on the eating/food issues thing. I have lost about 45 pounds.... i need to lose quite a bit more and havent been able to the last year BUT I have kept off so far what I have lost. I too am finding ways to cope without drowning my sorrows in sweet stuff.</p><p></p><p>DDD I think there are those of us who dont eat when stressed, and those of us who use food to cope with stress. Neither of those options are real healthy.... and our goal at this point is to find ways to be healthier in spite of the stress we are all under.</p><p></p><p>TL</p></blockquote><p></p>
[QUOTE="toughlovin, post: 565965"] Ag I am totally with you on all of it. It is true that the likelihood of him getting in recovery is lower with his attitude and it seemingly being you doing more of the work than he is. But there are cases where people go into treatment unwillingly and do find recovery and the want while there. That did not happen withy my difficult child and we have spent way more than 10K on treatment for him over the years and in the last year. However I dont really regret the money we have spent for two reasons. Especially when he was younger it did give him some drug free time for his brain to continue to develop without drugs in his system. I think that probably will make a difference in the long run at least I hope so. And the last year of treatment after treatment, with my working much harder than he was to get him into treatment etc. did help me get to the place I am now. I think that is why your sponser said this is for you. I have gained some peace knowing that I did everything I could possibly do to help him. If he had died along the way and I had not done everything then I would be full of regrets. At this point if something happens to him (hopefully not) then at least I know within my own heart that i did everything. I think that is key to finding peace in the chaos that is our difficult children lives. And it helped me let go so that I can let my difficult child now really try to find his own way hitchhiking around the country homeless with no money etc. Now all I want is for him to stay in touch with me so that I know he is alive and surviving. So I say go for it, spend the money on his treatment and time will tell whether he made use of it or not. I am also with you on the eating/food issues thing. I have lost about 45 pounds.... i need to lose quite a bit more and havent been able to the last year BUT I have kept off so far what I have lost. I too am finding ways to cope without drowning my sorrows in sweet stuff. DDD I think there are those of us who dont eat when stressed, and those of us who use food to cope with stress. Neither of those options are real healthy.... and our goal at this point is to find ways to be healthier in spite of the stress we are all under. TL [/QUOTE]
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