Forums
New posts
Search forums
What's new
New posts
New profile posts
Latest activity
Internet Search
Members
Current visitors
New profile posts
Search profile posts
Log in
Register
What's new
Search
Search
Search titles only
By:
New posts
Search forums
Menu
Log in
Register
Install the app
Install
Forums
Parent Support Forums
Substance Abuse
Validation of My Actions
JavaScript is disabled. For a better experience, please enable JavaScript in your browser before proceeding.
You are using an out of date browser. It may not display this or other websites correctly.
You should upgrade or use an
alternative browser
.
Reply to thread
Message
<blockquote data-quote="Copabanana" data-source="post: 764897" data-attributes="member: 18958"><p>You are not alone. </p><p></p><p>First, if this is your real name, please change it for your privacy and your family's. </p><p></p><p>The anger and volatility and blaming that your son is doing are part of the disease. It is a wonderful thing that he maintained sobriety for 18 months. As you may know, relapse is a part of recovery. I recognize his probation may be revoked as a consequence of his drinking. If it is, it is. It's the reality that he must face. But you don't have to face it with him. </p><p></p><p>Just because we suffer does not mean we are not strong. You will find support and understanding here with us. Almost all of us are in your situation and have been for many years. We have each other. Most of us have very few others in our lives that truly understand. I know, I don't. What I am trying to say here, is that I feel certain you have strength and you have coped, but enough is enough. Sometimes we can't fit one more bit of suffering in us, and we need to share it with others. Here, with us, you can.</p><p></p><p>I pray your son gets or returns to treatment. Mental health issues can be secondary to drinking. That is, the alcoholism can cause them. And of course, people turn to alcohol to self-medicate, too. But the thing is, it's your son's business what he does and when. </p><p></p><p>I have tried for years and years to get my son to get psychological and drug treatment to no avail. He does not want to. Period. If after all these years I keep pressuring him, who is the one with the problem? I am. </p><p></p><p>Our adult children are entitled to their own lives. And their own feelings. The best thing I have done for my son and myself is to back a whole lot out of his life and to accept that he calls the shots. Now I am trying to find a way back together, a healthy distance. It's hard.</p><p></p><p>My son is mentally ill and has had a traumatic brain injury. I have come to face that he may not have the capacity ever to live as I would have wished. I am trying (again) to find a way that I can help him without putting myself in a meat grinder. It is very, very difficult. As you love your son, II love my child. Welcome.</p></blockquote><p></p>
[QUOTE="Copabanana, post: 764897, member: 18958"] You are not alone. First, if this is your real name, please change it for your privacy and your family's. The anger and volatility and blaming that your son is doing are part of the disease. It is a wonderful thing that he maintained sobriety for 18 months. As you may know, relapse is a part of recovery. I recognize his probation may be revoked as a consequence of his drinking. If it is, it is. It's the reality that he must face. But you don't have to face it with him. Just because we suffer does not mean we are not strong. You will find support and understanding here with us. Almost all of us are in your situation and have been for many years. We have each other. Most of us have very few others in our lives that truly understand. I know, I don't. What I am trying to say here, is that I feel certain you have strength and you have coped, but enough is enough. Sometimes we can't fit one more bit of suffering in us, and we need to share it with others. Here, with us, you can. I pray your son gets or returns to treatment. Mental health issues can be secondary to drinking. That is, the alcoholism can cause them. And of course, people turn to alcohol to self-medicate, too. But the thing is, it's your son's business what he does and when. I have tried for years and years to get my son to get psychological and drug treatment to no avail. He does not want to. Period. If after all these years I keep pressuring him, who is the one with the problem? I am. Our adult children are entitled to their own lives. And their own feelings. The best thing I have done for my son and myself is to back a whole lot out of his life and to accept that he calls the shots. Now I am trying to find a way back together, a healthy distance. It's hard. My son is mentally ill and has had a traumatic brain injury. I have come to face that he may not have the capacity ever to live as I would have wished. I am trying (again) to find a way that I can help him without putting myself in a meat grinder. It is very, very difficult. As you love your son, II love my child. Welcome. [/QUOTE]
Insert quotes…
Verification
Post reply
Forums
Parent Support Forums
Substance Abuse
Validation of My Actions
Top