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Parent Emeritus
Venting, updating, just very conflicted right now.
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<blockquote data-quote="BusynMember" data-source="post: 640239" data-attributes="member: 1550"><p>I felt like my entire family were aliens, including me. I had a keen understanding from early on that the family was not "right."</p><p></p><p>I may have been the only kid in the world who used to wish I'd been adopted (this is the truth) and maybe have another family that would love me one day, but I looked just like my mother. Can't tell you how, in the worst days of my mental illness, how many times I thought of throwing acid on my face, even though my mother (and myself) were considered quite pretty. I just hated looking like her.</p><p></p><p>I was more GFGish than you, GM. I had no problem telling my parents what I thought of them and we had many fights. And my mother remembered every single one into she died. I was the black sheep because I called everyone out on their crapola.</p><p></p><p>Me: (as a youngish kid to mother) Mothers aren't supposed to call their children idiots and stupid! You shouldn't do that. Nobody else's mom does that.</p><p></p><p>Her: YES, THEY DO! PARENTS DO THAT WHEN THEIR KIDS ACT LIKE IDIOTS OR ARE STUPID, JUST LIKE YOU ARE ACTING NOW!</p><p></p><p>Me: I never hear it when I go to their houses and I asked the kids in my class and they say they don't! They think you're mean to say things like that.</p><p></p><p>Whoa momma. I was in trouble from early on.</p><p></p><p>People made fun of me because of the way my mother was, both treating me like a baby (like insisting on walking me to school two blocks away at age ten so a 'bad man' wouldn't get me, and then turning around and calling me horrible names in front of everyone. Trust me, the kids called me the same names that she did).</p><p></p><p>Oh, well. She taught me to never call my kids names. I have done so less then the fingers on one hand and have always apologized and said I was wrong. At least she taught me how not to be a mother.</p></blockquote><p></p>
[QUOTE="BusynMember, post: 640239, member: 1550"] I felt like my entire family were aliens, including me. I had a keen understanding from early on that the family was not "right." I may have been the only kid in the world who used to wish I'd been adopted (this is the truth) and maybe have another family that would love me one day, but I looked just like my mother. Can't tell you how, in the worst days of my mental illness, how many times I thought of throwing acid on my face, even though my mother (and myself) were considered quite pretty. I just hated looking like her. I was more GFGish than you, GM. I had no problem telling my parents what I thought of them and we had many fights. And my mother remembered every single one into she died. I was the black sheep because I called everyone out on their crapola. Me: (as a youngish kid to mother) Mothers aren't supposed to call their children idiots and stupid! You shouldn't do that. Nobody else's mom does that. Her: YES, THEY DO! PARENTS DO THAT WHEN THEIR KIDS ACT LIKE IDIOTS OR ARE STUPID, JUST LIKE YOU ARE ACTING NOW! Me: I never hear it when I go to their houses and I asked the kids in my class and they say they don't! They think you're mean to say things like that. Whoa momma. I was in trouble from early on. People made fun of me because of the way my mother was, both treating me like a baby (like insisting on walking me to school two blocks away at age ten so a 'bad man' wouldn't get me, and then turning around and calling me horrible names in front of everyone. Trust me, the kids called me the same names that she did). Oh, well. She taught me to never call my kids names. I have done so less then the fingers on one hand and have always apologized and said I was wrong. At least she taught me how not to be a mother. [/QUOTE]
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Venting, updating, just very conflicted right now.
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