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Very disappointed. 19yo DGD pregnant...
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<blockquote data-quote="Copabanana" data-source="post: 751960" data-attributes="member: 18958"><p>I want to tell you ksm how sorry I am that you have this, too, on your plate.He may not have a license, but he's got legs and feet.</p><p></p><p>Why do I think he must be bullying her or more, to get her to walk those 3 blocks in the heat, sick?</p><p>The thing is she already is likely already his victim. The question is how to support the mindset that she does not have to be?</p><p></p><p>I agree with whoever said to NOT buy food that will either subsidize him or subsidize them as a unit. The reality is that the two of them as a couple already entails abuse, if she is walking in the heat those blocks, so that he does not have to.</p><p></p><p>As far as encouraging her to bring or to not bring the guy with her to birthright. I would not get involved in this.</p><p></p><p>I don't want to get dramatic here. But if he is hitting her and threatening her, her life and the baby's, are at stake. I think this, all of it, is a topic for Al Anon. I would think that the boundaries here need to be drawn very, very tightly and clearly. I think I would invite her home, if you want to, and draw the line there. So that she knows that is always an option for her and the baby. And help for her to be healthy. And then only give her addresses and phone numbers, including for shelters and for Domestic Violence. Anything you do for her in that couple, enables the couple. There is no way that is in your DGD'S interests, in my view, that you shore them up or subsidize them, as long as they are together.</p><p></p><p>I think putting this in place, a response that supports her being safe and healthy, without supporting them as a couple is doable. But not easy, for sure.</p></blockquote><p></p>
[QUOTE="Copabanana, post: 751960, member: 18958"] I want to tell you ksm how sorry I am that you have this, too, on your plate.He may not have a license, but he's got legs and feet. Why do I think he must be bullying her or more, to get her to walk those 3 blocks in the heat, sick? The thing is she already is likely already his victim. The question is how to support the mindset that she does not have to be? I agree with whoever said to NOT buy food that will either subsidize him or subsidize them as a unit. The reality is that the two of them as a couple already entails abuse, if she is walking in the heat those blocks, so that he does not have to. As far as encouraging her to bring or to not bring the guy with her to birthright. I would not get involved in this. I don't want to get dramatic here. But if he is hitting her and threatening her, her life and the baby's, are at stake. I think this, all of it, is a topic for Al Anon. I would think that the boundaries here need to be drawn very, very tightly and clearly. I think I would invite her home, if you want to, and draw the line there. So that she knows that is always an option for her and the baby. And help for her to be healthy. And then only give her addresses and phone numbers, including for shelters and for Domestic Violence. Anything you do for her in that couple, enables the couple. There is no way that is in your DGD'S interests, in my view, that you shore them up or subsidize them, as long as they are together. I think putting this in place, a response that supports her being safe and healthy, without supporting them as a couple is doable. But not easy, for sure. [/QUOTE]
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Very disappointed. 19yo DGD pregnant...
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