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Visit with son on Friday
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<blockquote data-quote="slsh" data-source="post: 174233" data-attributes="member: 8"><p>What strikes me most is that it sounds like your son is in a facility that is well staffed by folks who paid attention to their training. Kudos to them for staying on top of things. This is hugely reassuring to me because it means your boy is safe. Not all facilities are as on top of things.</p><p> </p><p>It's *really* hard to watch our kids be exposed to things they wouldn't have been had they been able to stay at home. When he was 6, after one hospitalization he told me he realized he was lucky because husband and I do don't crack! Broke my heart that other kids were having to live in that situation *and* that my son was having to learn about the more unhappy sides of life. </p><p> </p><p>Unfortunately, it is what it is. thank you has seen awful lot of not so great stuff in his various placements. I do have to say that in general, I honestly don't think his peers' behaviors have influenced him a whole lot (aside from smoking and pot - but compared to the other stuff... well, it could be worse). I also have not ever had the sense that he ever lived in fear. He's had peers who were more aggressive than him but he seems to have an innate sense of who to not provoke - which I actually think is a great thing because for a while there, when he was very young, husband and I worried that he didn't have then sense not to "poke the bear" and would one day get hurt badly for messing with the wrong kid.</p><p> </p><p>It is not what we want for our kids. We want to be able to protect them. I think it's a given when you have to place a child in the hospital or in Residential Treatment Center (RTC), they *will* be exposed to some dark stuff. I think it's important to listen and support, and anytime thank you's ever hinted that he didn't feel safe, I was on the phone to staff in heartbeat. thank you's perception was usually the problem, rather than an actual danger, but part of treatment is working on his perception too.</p><p> </p><p>A gentle hug to you. I'm so very sorry that your family is going thru this. I hope the placement comes through quickly and he is able to start working on a return home soon.</p></blockquote><p></p>
[QUOTE="slsh, post: 174233, member: 8"] What strikes me most is that it sounds like your son is in a facility that is well staffed by folks who paid attention to their training. Kudos to them for staying on top of things. This is hugely reassuring to me because it means your boy is safe. Not all facilities are as on top of things. It's *really* hard to watch our kids be exposed to things they wouldn't have been had they been able to stay at home. When he was 6, after one hospitalization he told me he realized he was lucky because husband and I do don't crack! Broke my heart that other kids were having to live in that situation *and* that my son was having to learn about the more unhappy sides of life. Unfortunately, it is what it is. thank you has seen awful lot of not so great stuff in his various placements. I do have to say that in general, I honestly don't think his peers' behaviors have influenced him a whole lot (aside from smoking and pot - but compared to the other stuff... well, it could be worse). I also have not ever had the sense that he ever lived in fear. He's had peers who were more aggressive than him but he seems to have an innate sense of who to not provoke - which I actually think is a great thing because for a while there, when he was very young, husband and I worried that he didn't have then sense not to "poke the bear" and would one day get hurt badly for messing with the wrong kid. It is not what we want for our kids. We want to be able to protect them. I think it's a given when you have to place a child in the hospital or in Residential Treatment Center (RTC), they *will* be exposed to some dark stuff. I think it's important to listen and support, and anytime thank you's ever hinted that he didn't feel safe, I was on the phone to staff in heartbeat. thank you's perception was usually the problem, rather than an actual danger, but part of treatment is working on his perception too. A gentle hug to you. I'm so very sorry that your family is going thru this. I hope the placement comes through quickly and he is able to start working on a return home soon. [/QUOTE]
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