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waiting for the other shoe......
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<blockquote data-quote="missy44" data-source="post: 283893" data-attributes="member: 6201"><p>HI Stands,</p><p> </p><p>I understand the "waiting for the other shoe to drop" feeling. It can consume us. You need to see a counselor who can help you to realize that our difficult children have to be willing to help themselves and there is nothing we can do.</p><p> </p><p>My difficult child has recently moved home, but first, before we allowed it we had to see that he was helping himself or the door was closed. He stopped using all drugs, eating and gaining weight, has been searching for a job everyday, seeing a pscy and taking his antidepressent, and then he sought out a substance abuse/depression programme all on his own. Then we let him move home. NOw he has his chance. If he blows it, he's out, if he wants to help himself and turn his life around he is welcome to stay.</p><p> </p><p>My husband and I have been practising tough love for the last year. It's been hard to not allow our 18 yr old son to come home but we have other children in the home and ourselves to think about. We didn't choose the life difficult child was leading. </p><p> </p><p>I guess what i"m trying to say is that i understand your feelings but you need to get help to deal with those feelings and move on. when and if your son wants to change you'll see the actions and you'll know.</p><p> </p><p>my thoughts are with you and your family.</p><p>missy</p></blockquote><p></p>
[QUOTE="missy44, post: 283893, member: 6201"] HI Stands, I understand the "waiting for the other shoe to drop" feeling. It can consume us. You need to see a counselor who can help you to realize that our difficult children have to be willing to help themselves and there is nothing we can do. My difficult child has recently moved home, but first, before we allowed it we had to see that he was helping himself or the door was closed. He stopped using all drugs, eating and gaining weight, has been searching for a job everyday, seeing a pscy and taking his antidepressent, and then he sought out a substance abuse/depression programme all on his own. Then we let him move home. NOw he has his chance. If he blows it, he's out, if he wants to help himself and turn his life around he is welcome to stay. My husband and I have been practising tough love for the last year. It's been hard to not allow our 18 yr old son to come home but we have other children in the home and ourselves to think about. We didn't choose the life difficult child was leading. I guess what i"m trying to say is that i understand your feelings but you need to get help to deal with those feelings and move on. when and if your son wants to change you'll see the actions and you'll know. my thoughts are with you and your family. missy [/QUOTE]
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waiting for the other shoe......
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