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Walked out of my life
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<blockquote data-quote="dlgallant" data-source="post: 41889" data-attributes="member: 3721"><p>The roots of her behavior started years ago. and not 1 thing sets it off. An abusive father, the loss of an older brother, the victim of a sexual assault. After years of supervised visitation her father won unrestricted visitation from ages 11-16. He did a lot of damage in that time. at age 13 he made a false report to the police that she was a heroine addict and dealer. The police descended on the school, removed her searched her locker. The entire school was buzzing that the "Ruth Award" winner (the student at the school with the most character) was being accused of drugs. While she was mortified and it was all completely disproven, it seemed to have planted the seed that this is a way to get attention. She also completely lost confidence in the legal system and couldn't understand why they wouldn't protect her from him. And at some level she lost confidence in my ability as a parent to protect her.</p><p></p><p>This coupled with developing a defense mechanism to runaway when life gets too overwhelming and you have my daughter. Between 15 - 16 she ran away 3 times, all when things were going on she didn't want to deal with. Approaching her 18 birthday I became very concerned because she began not being where she was supposed to be and I would find out stories she'd tell people. That she had been in jail, re-hab, I had been in mail, I was mistreating her. I tried talking to her and told her my concerns but unfortunately counseling wasn't much of an option. The family courts ordered her to stop going to her counselor and go to a court appointed one that would support reunification with her father. They also ordered the counselor had to report to the court. Alyssa had no privacy and therefore would not risk opening up to be exposed to the world. And quite frankly I don't blame her. If I could have afforderd not to use insurance I would have taken her somewhere and paid cash. She and I had an agreement that after her 18 birthday she would go back to her counselor. But she took off and never looked back. Until maybe now. I woke up to a message on my cell that someone was bringing her to see me today. My fingers are crossed. I fear the longer she lives in this fake world and hanging around with real drug users that she will eventually become a part of that world.</p></blockquote><p></p>
[QUOTE="dlgallant, post: 41889, member: 3721"] The roots of her behavior started years ago. and not 1 thing sets it off. An abusive father, the loss of an older brother, the victim of a sexual assault. After years of supervised visitation her father won unrestricted visitation from ages 11-16. He did a lot of damage in that time. at age 13 he made a false report to the police that she was a heroine addict and dealer. The police descended on the school, removed her searched her locker. The entire school was buzzing that the "Ruth Award" winner (the student at the school with the most character) was being accused of drugs. While she was mortified and it was all completely disproven, it seemed to have planted the seed that this is a way to get attention. She also completely lost confidence in the legal system and couldn't understand why they wouldn't protect her from him. And at some level she lost confidence in my ability as a parent to protect her. This coupled with developing a defense mechanism to runaway when life gets too overwhelming and you have my daughter. Between 15 - 16 she ran away 3 times, all when things were going on she didn't want to deal with. Approaching her 18 birthday I became very concerned because she began not being where she was supposed to be and I would find out stories she'd tell people. That she had been in jail, re-hab, I had been in mail, I was mistreating her. I tried talking to her and told her my concerns but unfortunately counseling wasn't much of an option. The family courts ordered her to stop going to her counselor and go to a court appointed one that would support reunification with her father. They also ordered the counselor had to report to the court. Alyssa had no privacy and therefore would not risk opening up to be exposed to the world. And quite frankly I don't blame her. If I could have afforderd not to use insurance I would have taken her somewhere and paid cash. She and I had an agreement that after her 18 birthday she would go back to her counselor. But she took off and never looked back. Until maybe now. I woke up to a message on my cell that someone was bringing her to see me today. My fingers are crossed. I fear the longer she lives in this fake world and hanging around with real drug users that she will eventually become a part of that world. [/QUOTE]
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