Feelingbroken
New Member
Hello everyone. This is my first post here on this forum. I write from Great Britain (any British people on here?) in ref to my almost 20 years old son.
Last year my son went to Uni and failed his first year due to parties and use of substances (weed). Last summer it took us ages to realise whether he smoked pot and how much of it (hubby kept denying son had a drug problem). After finishing his first year he came back home and stayed with us during the summer period. He had the most lazy time ever doing virtually nothing. I work part time so I was able to keep an eye on him. Late August we made the decision to send him back to repeat his first year at Uni. Here in UK students get a student loan so having agreed to get a job it made it possible for him to return. Everything was fine until Xmas. Beginning of January he gave up his job with the excuse of needing more time to study but he went downhill from that time onwards with his Uni course. As a family we feel totally heartbroken. In spite all my love I failed to be a mother to him helped by my husband who always allowed him to get away with everything. We are paying a high price for that now but my husband won't admit his faults. I could write a book. I doubt people would be interested. Today I am here to ask what can I do next?! What kind of support can I give my son if he doesn't want to admit that indeed he has a drug problem?
His latest idea.... he wants to produce a music album. Although he has lots of talent the type of music he wants to create isn't the so called standard type. I have reasons to believe he has mental issues. In a way he's in danger to himself and others. What do I do now sit here and watch him burn away?? Feeling desperate.
Last year my son went to Uni and failed his first year due to parties and use of substances (weed). Last summer it took us ages to realise whether he smoked pot and how much of it (hubby kept denying son had a drug problem). After finishing his first year he came back home and stayed with us during the summer period. He had the most lazy time ever doing virtually nothing. I work part time so I was able to keep an eye on him. Late August we made the decision to send him back to repeat his first year at Uni. Here in UK students get a student loan so having agreed to get a job it made it possible for him to return. Everything was fine until Xmas. Beginning of January he gave up his job with the excuse of needing more time to study but he went downhill from that time onwards with his Uni course. As a family we feel totally heartbroken. In spite all my love I failed to be a mother to him helped by my husband who always allowed him to get away with everything. We are paying a high price for that now but my husband won't admit his faults. I could write a book. I doubt people would be interested. Today I am here to ask what can I do next?! What kind of support can I give my son if he doesn't want to admit that indeed he has a drug problem?
His latest idea.... he wants to produce a music album. Although he has lots of talent the type of music he wants to create isn't the so called standard type. I have reasons to believe he has mental issues. In a way he's in danger to himself and others. What do I do now sit here and watch him burn away?? Feeling desperate.