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<blockquote data-quote="scent of cedar" data-source="post: 131507" data-attributes="member: 1721"><p>I think you have done all you can (or should) at this point, Nomad.</p><p></p><p>Now you need to practice detaching from the situations difficult child's choices bring her. </p><p></p><p>If difficult child believes she has found an apartment she can afford and this is what she wants to do, once you have given her the information about her options and given her your best advice, I think this might be the time to let her learn how to fend for herself in the world. </p><p></p><p>If she is sorry that she lost the first apartment, she will be more careful in the second one.</p><p></p><p>This was a hard lesson for her, but better that she learn it now than later or never.</p><p></p><p>We cannot protect our children from their choices.</p><p></p><p>We can only advise them, and try to function as healthy role models for them.</p><p></p><p>I am glad you called the 211 number, and that you found so much good information for her. It sounds like you are trying to help and advise her, and that is a right and good thing to do. But once we have done all that we know, then we need to practice our detachment skills in earnest.</p><p></p><p>It isn't easy, but I know you can do this.</p><p></p><p>I am so sorry to hear that you are not feeling well! Know that I am keeping you in my thoughts and prayers, Nomad.</p><p></p><p>Barbara</p></blockquote><p></p>
[QUOTE="scent of cedar, post: 131507, member: 1721"] I think you have done all you can (or should) at this point, Nomad. Now you need to practice detaching from the situations difficult child's choices bring her. If difficult child believes she has found an apartment she can afford and this is what she wants to do, once you have given her the information about her options and given her your best advice, I think this might be the time to let her learn how to fend for herself in the world. If she is sorry that she lost the first apartment, she will be more careful in the second one. This was a hard lesson for her, but better that she learn it now than later or never. We cannot protect our children from their choices. We can only advise them, and try to function as healthy role models for them. I am glad you called the 211 number, and that you found so much good information for her. It sounds like you are trying to help and advise her, and that is a right and good thing to do. But once we have done all that we know, then we need to practice our detachment skills in earnest. It isn't easy, but I know you can do this. I am so sorry to hear that you are not feeling well! Know that I am keeping you in my thoughts and prayers, Nomad. Barbara [/QUOTE]
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