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<blockquote data-quote="Fran" data-source="post: 221124" data-attributes="member: 3"><p>Adrianne, once a parent agrees to hold the financial strings and control for an adult difficult child's SSI, you must be accountable. My difficult child is fiscally incompetant. I don't want to have to answer for his choices to the bureaucrats. </p><p></p><p>Nomad, if she finds someone who eases the lonliness and makes her feel more alive then maybe helping them will be an asset on both sides of the fence. </p><p>I wondered who difficult child would marry until I realized that there is no reason that 2 difficult child's who help each other are just as likely to make a life than 2 easy child's. If my difficult child wanted to marry or live with a significant other, I would support his choice, knowing that we would have to be their safety net for basic adult life like car insurance, taxes etc. </p><p>I am pretty sure that my difficult child will never live a life without some safety net. Basically, I expect to be on the end of the phone for the rest of his life to help him solve problems. </p><p></p><p>I hope your difficult child realizes she needs to take care of herself first before she helps others. Maybe just maybe she will grow this relationship and he will stop drinking. </p><p></p><p>DDD, the lowest common denominator job is the norm. difficult child knows when people talk to him like he is stupid or can't hear. It infuriates him. He swallows the humiliation and keeps working but slowly he drags his feet and doesn't want to go back. Bagging groceries is always the first job that's offered. Meanwhile being in the public eye is probably the worst type job.</p></blockquote><p></p>
[QUOTE="Fran, post: 221124, member: 3"] Adrianne, once a parent agrees to hold the financial strings and control for an adult difficult child's SSI, you must be accountable. My difficult child is fiscally incompetant. I don't want to have to answer for his choices to the bureaucrats. Nomad, if she finds someone who eases the lonliness and makes her feel more alive then maybe helping them will be an asset on both sides of the fence. I wondered who difficult child would marry until I realized that there is no reason that 2 difficult child's who help each other are just as likely to make a life than 2 easy child's. If my difficult child wanted to marry or live with a significant other, I would support his choice, knowing that we would have to be their safety net for basic adult life like car insurance, taxes etc. I am pretty sure that my difficult child will never live a life without some safety net. Basically, I expect to be on the end of the phone for the rest of his life to help him solve problems. I hope your difficult child realizes she needs to take care of herself first before she helps others. Maybe just maybe she will grow this relationship and he will stop drinking. DDD, the lowest common denominator job is the norm. difficult child knows when people talk to him like he is stupid or can't hear. It infuriates him. He swallows the humiliation and keeps working but slowly he drags his feet and doesn't want to go back. Bagging groceries is always the first job that's offered. Meanwhile being in the public eye is probably the worst type job. [/QUOTE]
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