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<blockquote data-quote="susiestar" data-source="post: 357031" data-attributes="member: 1233"><p>Terry, have you discussed the gifts with whomever is in authority at the home? If P is giving a lot of gifts to the staff she may feel that the staff will be "mean" to her if she doesn't, or that she won't get what she is supposed to get. She may even think that she is supposed to give regular gifts to the staff. As she is giving away what seems like a fair amount of stuff, with a pricetag that is nothing to sneeze at (Godiva sure isn't cheap!! Neither are nice undies.), the total of these gifts could put a real crimp in her budget, esp if it continues for months or years. It may be time for YOU to step in and insist that NO gifts be accepted by the staff. If P cannot comprehend that she is not to give gifts then a box would be a good idea. IF the staff will follow through. </p><p></p><p>I guess it concerns me because I spent a lot of time in my Gma's retirement home and know how expensive things are. I wouldn't want it to cause a real hardship for her down the road. Or want her to feel that she will not be well cared for if she does not give these gifts. It seems to be a somewhat common motive behind gifts in nursing homes and retirement centers, because I have had several friends have to fight this with elderly relatives. Sadly a couple of them truly had their relatives hurt or neglected by staff when the gifts were stopped. I don't want the staff to "expect" or demand these from P and her end up in a tricky situation.</p></blockquote><p></p>
[QUOTE="susiestar, post: 357031, member: 1233"] Terry, have you discussed the gifts with whomever is in authority at the home? If P is giving a lot of gifts to the staff she may feel that the staff will be "mean" to her if she doesn't, or that she won't get what she is supposed to get. She may even think that she is supposed to give regular gifts to the staff. As she is giving away what seems like a fair amount of stuff, with a pricetag that is nothing to sneeze at (Godiva sure isn't cheap!! Neither are nice undies.), the total of these gifts could put a real crimp in her budget, esp if it continues for months or years. It may be time for YOU to step in and insist that NO gifts be accepted by the staff. If P cannot comprehend that she is not to give gifts then a box would be a good idea. IF the staff will follow through. I guess it concerns me because I spent a lot of time in my Gma's retirement home and know how expensive things are. I wouldn't want it to cause a real hardship for her down the road. Or want her to feel that she will not be well cared for if she does not give these gifts. It seems to be a somewhat common motive behind gifts in nursing homes and retirement centers, because I have had several friends have to fight this with elderly relatives. Sadly a couple of them truly had their relatives hurt or neglected by staff when the gifts were stopped. I don't want the staff to "expect" or demand these from P and her end up in a tricky situation. [/QUOTE]
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